Sufferer The Journey

[LJPO5]

Hi. Not sure what to write so this will be interesting:). I feel like shouting, "I fu&*ing did this!" I was diagnosed in 2010, medically retired from the military in 2011, sought treatment and was prescribed many medications, participated in very regular therapy for a few years now, and finished my detox of all meds (personal decision, supervised, and incredibly difficult) a couple months ago. Do I feel, at times, I may need meds to survive in this world? Yes. Do I want to take more meds? No. I recognize I'm presently depressed because I don't feel like I belong ... anywhere, but I also recognize it's okay ... uncomfortable, but okay ... another challenge. What I lost in this process: sense of identity, purpose in life, and a husband:). What I gained: freedom and the chance to seek new identity and purpose. What I remind myself daily: 1) I fell into a depth of despair from which I couldn't see light and I now see light, and 2) I may still be on the road to recovery, but I've traveled quite a distance:).

 

[Queen Boudica]

Thank you @LJPO5 that's really inspiring. Welcome, with such an inspiring post, I am sure you will gain from here.

Feel the same way. I know I'm depressed. No I don't want meds, even though every single professional, seems to want to push them on you. It is ok to be depressed and yer, I don't feel like I belong too. Exactly another challenge amongst many. God feel like I could've written exactly the same, I lost the husband, but I really needed, to. I never really had an identity it was crushed and intertwined with who my mother, my sister and my ex wanted me to be. And I never had a purpose, except my kids.

Freedom is pivotal. Seeking that new identity and purpose is really hard. But look back at the road you've travelled and you are no longer on that road to hell, you've taken a new fork in the road, and you can see that light. Even when it gets dark, you know that light will come back again.

 

[Bees Are Awesome]

Hello and welcome! I really like your perspective on your journey in recovery. We can all use some of that positivity at times. :)

 

[SabrinaB]

Welcome to this great community and I look forward to hearing more about your story and the experiences you've had along the way!

 

[Friday]

Welcome to the forums :) LOL. Always comes down to the improvise, adapt, & overcome, doesn't it? Cheers.

 

[intothelight]

Welcome to the forum!