Therapist Talking To Doctor!

[desiderata310]

Recently because of all the things going on I have been in a very bad spot and strung out because of stress. It's been building and for the last several days sleep has been rare or non existant. I told my therapist this yesterday during a very bad session. I had managed to get about 2 hours sleep in the previous 48 hour peroid. Last night I managed three hours.

During our session I had a bad flashback and evidently my therapist was triggering me (according to him). He finally insisted last night that I get on some sort of sleep medication. Today he tried to simply phone it in to my doctor's office but when that failed he made an appointment for me. I got a text about an hour before that I need to go to the doc's office! He told the doctor there a thumbnail of what was going on and asked to put me on something for sleep.

I think the hardest thing was knowing that my therapist had spoken to this doctor and that he knew my history when he walked in. I broke down into tears. I'm also very much a non "touch" person and the doctor kept wanting to pat my shoulder. It was all I could do to keep my seat.

It was really unnerving to have this doctor that I had NEVER SEEN walk in, and knew my history. He asked about my restraining order, if I felt safe at my house, if I had any friends. etc. It was mortifying. When I went in I knew that the doctor would have SOME information (which actually stressed me out! I thought that he would also know about my suicidal stuff and my cutting and that he would put me in patient. My therapist had to reassure me that we were only going to concentrate on the sleep medication) I I had no idea that he would divulge so much to my doctor. I felt it was a bit more than a "thumb nail" I have no idea if I should even address this with him. Honestly, I feel like I've taken up too much of his time and efforts already but I have to go back for a followup in two weeks to make sure that I am ok and the meds are working and I dread having to be in the same room with this person again. It was telling what my paperwork said since the NURSE looked at me and said "so you just want to sleep, you poor dear" oh god. oh dear god. I knew that my paperwork included basic notes and the doctor and my therapist spoke on the phone while I was in the room waiting.

I really feel... betrayed. I don't know if that's fair or not but I just... I have never spoken with anyone else about my PTSD and it hit me like an electric shock when the doctor looked at me and started talking about it. It hurt. It was jarring.

My therapist texted me and asked me if I liked him. All I could say was that it really freaked me out that he knew so much of my history. I don't think my therapist got it. It's like having a stranger forcably undress me.

I don't know what to do. I'm waiting on the sleep stuff to kick in. I really want to sleep.

 

[joeylittle]

My therapist texted me and asked me if I liked him. All I could say was that it really freaked me out that he knew so much of my history. I don't think my therapist got it. It's like having a stranger forcably undress me.

I'm surprised at your therapist. Unless you signed a release form for your therapist to talk to any MD about co-ordination of care, then your therapist was in the wrong, ethically. He broke confidentiality.

You have every right to feel like something wrong happened. It was wrong.

If you had signed a release between your therapist and any MD at the office you went to, then what he did is allowable, but still you have every right to feel uncomfortable.

Big picture: if the meds work, and your therapist acting on your behalf turns out to be something that in the morning you think was actually worth it, then all you need probably is a convo about confidentiality going forward. But if you aren't comfortable with this after sitting with it, you really have reason to open up a conversation about it. Whether you think he's doing you a favor or not (in general, by giving you so much time) doesn't matter. He told people things that you did not intend for him to tell people. Not cool.

I'm only stressing this so that you understand that he really wasn't supposed to do that - not to encourage you one way or the other. I just want to validate that you are feeling violated because you were.

 

[katiekat]

Hey there-so sorry you had to go through this-how mordifying! I started a thread the other day called "Crossing Therapy Boundaries" and I suggest you read it because according to what the majority of commenters are saying, I think your therapist crossed some boundaries.

 

[digger]

He finally insisted last night that I get on some sort of sleep medication. Today he tried to simply phone it in to my doctor's office but when that failed he made an appointment for me. I got a text about an hour before that I need to go to the doc's office! He told the doctor there a thumbnail of what was going on and asked to put me on something for sleep.

I'm a bit confused - is this something you talked about with him and agreed to him doing, or did he just go ahead and do it without your consent?

 

[Rumors]

Des,
I can't imagine how you must feel. I am so private I would have a panic attack knowing someone knew something! However, given that your doctor had consent to try and get meds for you, I think it is pretty cool that he cared enough about you to make an appointment and see that you got proper care. As well, a doctor shouldn't/couldn't/wouldn't just prescribe sleeping pills blindly based upon someone just "saying" you needed them. That wouldn't be professional either. One more positive thing to think about, your therapist only gave this doctor a framework of what is going on not the full detailed story. In doing this, he has created a safe resource for you to contact for medical needs. You must be an incredibly special person for your T to want to make sure you are cared for so well!! I hope you can take some positives from this experience as well. Hang in there!!!!!!!! Sending mojo!

 

[scout86]

I hope you get some sleep! The world can look a lot different when you're not totally exhausted.

That's kind of a complicated situation. Sleep deprivation really CAN mess you up, But, like @Rumors said, a doctor shouldn't just had sleep meds out without a reason. To get it on your own, you'd have had to make an appointment yourself and go in, And then give them some kind of reason that would work. Would you have done that? The MD kind of needed to know "why" you were having trouble sleeping. He also really needed to know you could be a suicide risk. From a medical standpoint, that kind of thing matters. Would you have told him that?

You DO have the right not to tell people stuff and you DO have the right to not get any sleep too. Technically, your T probably crossed a line there. My T actually did something a bit like this last summer. It wasn't as serious a situation and involved an eye doctor, not an MD. I had an appointment. I needed to keep the appointment, there was stuff I was going to have trouble with, he knew it and knows the Dr, so he offered to talk to him. I gave permission, but just verbally, I think. Anyway, it turned out to be a good idea and I appreciate it. I'm not sure why he did it and was really surprised when he offered. I could have handled it myself and have in the past. But, his efforts really helped and I appreciate it. (And it's possible that whole deal was part of his ongoing campaign to get me to believe that I "matter".)

@desiderata310 , you 100% have a right to as much privacy as you want and no one should know about your PTSD, or anything else, if you don't want them too. There is no doubt about that, as far as I'm concerned. On the other hand, there are times when people can do a better job of doing THEIR jobs if they do know. "PTSD" and the events around it have a different meaning and significance to you than they do to people like this Dr. To him (I would hope) it's just a diagnosis. It's information, like "she's allergic to penicillin". People handle that as they will, but all it is is information that he needed to do his job and understand the situation. I don't think I'm finding the words to express what I'm trying to say........

The very first time I ever admitted that I'd been sexually molested, a good and close friend had made some real good guesses and set about to get me to talk about it, because he thought that was the thing to do. I didn't TELL him anything. All I could manage was a "yes" or "no" to some fairly vague, general questions. When we parted company that evening, I was sure the world had come to an end. (A BAD end!) I think I probably felt about that much like you're feeling about this, as far as people "knowing" goes, although it was a different situation. The next day, weirdly, nothing had changed. Again, words kind of fail me. I can't really explain what that was like. But, what I've learned, over time, is that the secrecy has a power all it's own and it's not a "Good" kind of power. It's not a liberating, freeing kind of power. The fear of people knowing and what they might think is actually a very negative, soul crushing kind of thing. Maybe I'm trying to say that I think there's a difference between "privacy" and "secrecy".

Here's another thought. Your T, as a "normal" person, may not totally GET the difference between privacy and secrecy. He may not totally get the power this information and the control of it has, so he may not totally get what it's like to have that information out of your control. Some of this might be good topics for future conversations.

Meanwhile, sleep well and get some rest!

 

[Justmehere]

Being sleep deprived can increase symptoms through the roof. It really affects the brain in huge ways.

His solution to help you get sleep medications was a good solution, but not well executed. There is no reason the doctor even needed to know a "thumbnail" other than the fact that you had PTSD and were suffering severe insomnia.

It is your choice, always, if the therapist talks to any doctor, and what specifically he tells the doctor. The only exception is when a minor child is in danger, or a client is a danger to themselves or others or is gravely disabled. (Which doesn't sound like you.)

It seems like your therapist really wanted to help, and both the therapist and the doctor forgot to respect how deeply sensitive and personal mental health information is - any kind of mental health information.

I don't think your therapist is a bad therapist or anything, but I think your reaction makes a lot of sense.

My therapist texted me and asked me if I liked him. All I could say was that it really freaked me out that he knew so much of my history. I don't think my therapist got it. It's like having a stranger forcably undress me.

I can really relate to this description. I actually requested a therapist talk to a doctor once and that doctor didn't say much about it, but I felt so EXPOSED when I went in. It is very vulnerable information. I gave permission for the information to be shared and yet I still felt horribly ashamed.

After some time, I began to realize that while privacy is VERY important, it was also ok that my doctor knew.

With my therapist now, I insist that if she ever talks to anyone, even the psychiatrist, we always talk about what she is going to talk about, what she isn't going to talk about. She is always sure a signed release is in place. Then we talk about it afterwards. This keeps it from freaking me out and allows me to experience feeling and being in control of my private info.

I hope you talk to you therapist about it so that he can better understand just what this was like for you, and that you can work this out with him. It is ok to tell him no and that this was not ok for you.

 

[desiderata310]

@digger Sorry for the confusion. He offered to call and get the medication and I accepted. I was not aware that I would have to go in until that afternoon. At that point, while I was sitting in the exam room a conversation happened between the doctor and my therapist. I was not aware this would happen. I do not know specifically what was discussed but I DO know that the doctor came in with some pretty personal information that didn't necessarily have to ben told in order to explain the PTSD.

 

[digger]

In that case, I think your therapist was out of order. He should, in my opinion, have discussed with you first exactly what information he was going to share.

I think your feelings about it are understandable and valid and that this needs addressing with him.

On a side note, did you manage to get some sleep?

 

[circe47]

Unless you gave written permission for your therapist to discuss anything beyond your having a PTSD Dx( a severe anxiety disorder), your therapist violated your HIPAA rights. The notes he takes and the complaints you verbalize should never be disclosed to ANY individual without your signature on a consent to release information form to be exchanged between the two providers offices. The ONLY exception to this rule is if you are a danger to yourself or others, or a child is being harmed... Period! In that case, the therapist must contact the appropriate authorities.

Consent forms generally have boxes that should be checked off as far as what information you want disclosed to a third party. There are check off boxes for labs, imaging, chart's notes, HIV/AIDS status, blah de blah blah. You must personally check off each box that you don't mind the pertinent information being disclosed.

Mental health records are even more strictly confidential than any other type of health record. While you can ask for and have a right to your medical records, some mental health records may be kept from you for liability reasons and possible further psychic injury should you not be aware of things your own mind isn't ready to disclose to you. A third party provider certainly has no right to therapist's insights into your condition…...insights that you may not even be aware of yourself. I hope this makes sense.

I am militantly aware of and excercise my rights. I may not wish to damage the reputation of my therapist in a situation like this, but I would definitely make it clear that he shall not discuss the particulars with anyone ever again.

 

[risingsun]

He offered to call and get the medication and I accepted.

Yes, but he misrepresented what he was going to tell the doctor and that is not right. It should have been kept to my client cannot sleep and it is impacting my client emotionally/physically. Period. You did not give the therapist permission to disclose as much as he did. I am sorry that this has happened to you.

I do hope you got sleep. I would say something to your therapist. If they are not called out on such things, they will never learn.

Don't be embarrassed with respect to your doctor though. Try to let it go and move forward. Who cares what anyone thinks of you. The main thing is that you do get some sleep and do bring up your concerns to your therapist. Keep you head up high my friend. Warmest, Rising Sun.

 

[desiderata310]

I had a really terrible time last night. They prescribed Ambien which, it turns out, is a TERRIBLE thing for me to take. I had very ugly and vivid nightmares (more than usual), woke up repeatedly and felt like I was going to crawl out of my skin when I woke up for good four hours later.

Today was about me trying to come down from that, the ensuing panic attack, and dealing with talking to the doctor on the phone. I managed to get a new prescription but the doctor spent quite a while on the phone trying to convince me to go to the ER. I freaked out and started crying because I thought they were trying to put me inpatient. He finally relented and prescribed something different. I am working late again tonight and PRAYING that I sleep.

Tomorrow morning is my therapist appointment. I don't know how to even talk to him about this. He went out of his way to call the doctor for me and make the appointment but I am so distraught about what happened with him telling the doctor so much more than "she has PTSD" and minimizing my feelings about it... I just don't even want to go in the morning.