Thinking the worst

[RavenWine]

Sometimes I get so anxious that when this person I really like and have been seeing doesn't say anything to me for a day, that they're just done with me. And sometimes I'll say nothing to them or then other days, like yesterday, I kept wondering what I did wrong. And I really felt like they were done with me and I went from being sad and disappointed, to very angry, and then numb. And this morning he's like wondering why I'm flipping out because he knew I even had plans yesterday and so did he, so why would I think we'd be texting all day. I usually am cool with people not replying cause I know people have lives but for some reason yesterday I just really wanted to hear at least one word from him and when I didn't, I lost my shit. And now I'm embarrassed and don't even want to see him for at least a week.. Does anyone else get taken over by their anxiety and start thinking the worst, like everything is ending? I don't always know how to cope with that and I'm scared I'll just stress him out and he'll be done.

 

[PreciousChild]

I totally relate to this. I wish I could say that once you learn your lesson, you won't make the same mistake, but I do this over and over again with my boyfriend. I also do not usually care if anyone else is slow to respond to my texts. But when I don't get a text from my boyfriend when I expect it, I feel 100% justified in my upset and believe he is truly doing whatever it is that I am triggered about - ignoring me, not prioritizing me, etc. Early on in the relationship, there were two occasions that I felt so strongly wronged, I asked him to call me and we had to talk about his lack of response or his thin response. After talking, I always felt contrite, felt stupid for accusing him of being mean, persuaded that he was truly busy at work, etc. But even a year later, I still get upset when he's too slow to respond or responds with too few words. But now it's become a joke, and I complain that he's sent me to the ledge and I might not survive. He sends me ridiculous memes of people freaking out over not getting expected texts. I haven't totally gotten rid of my insecurities, but his supportive reassurances, and us making a joke out of it has really helped me to gain perspective. I hope your other can help you in this because though it may not be totally his responsibility, it really did help me to have a reassuring partner.

 

[Deanna]

Sometimes I get so anxious that when this person I really like and have been seeing doesn't say anything to me for a day, that they're just done with me. And sometimes I'll say nothing to them or then other days, like yesterday, I kept wondering what I did wrong. And I really felt like they were done with me and I went from being sad and disappointed, to very angry, and then numb. And this morning he's like wondering why I'm flipping out because he knew I even had plans yesterday and so did he, so why would I think we'd be texting all day. I usually am cool with people not replying cause I know people have lives but for some reason yesterday I just really wanted to hear at least one word from him and when I didn't, I lost my shit. And now I'm embarrassed and don't even want to see him for at least a week.. Does anyone else get taken over by their anxiety and start thinking the worst, like everything is ending? I don't always know how to cope with that and I'm scared I'll just stress him out and he'll be done.

Of-course we do. It was really out of hand when I was your age. ( I would not be diagnosed for another 35 years) Our insecurities take over. I use to shake inside, fearing the worst. There were also days when I was calm and my brain would just go the other way. I'd be right back in it. ( for no reason)

For me, my anxiety couldn't be solved, except for medication