Thoughts of cutting

[CaraG]

I hate it when you remember the songs you use to hurt yourself to and the urge hits you like a ton of bricks.

 

[EmmaOwl]

I hate it when you remember the songs you use to hurt yourself to and the urge hits you like a ton of bricks.

Me too. Whether it is actually playing or not, music looms large in my mind, and visceral reactions, follows my mood through many ups downs and all arounds... Can drastically and unexpectedly alter feelings mood etc.

What is an example for you? What songs might you think of to counter the negative? Or not get entranced either plus or minus. Staying on an even keel can be tough for me.

I'd say Nine Inch Nail's "Hurt" is... well, to me, it and its cover by Johnny Cash - that song covers me on several levels. It's just got a certain pull.

 

[CaraG]

Wonderland-kendall pain gets me. I know I can turn on upliftiing songs in a flash. I am a Christian and I record the worships sets at church on my phone. I can jist fli You ever get tired of resisting. Always being on guard on everything that might trigger you. You just want to say, you know what this one time I will go down this rabbit's home and see where it takes me. Next time I will fight it, but I just don't care right now. I don't have the energy to fight. I will follow these thoughts to a point. Somehow feeling depressed validates that you know what you faced trauma and it sucks. If you don't want to fight then go ahead but I always have to stand up and fight at some point because my mind can really go off the deep end if I let it. I remember one night after I EMDR and had disassociated to a severe point. I laid on my bed and read a whole entire book because I didn't want to face the realities in my head. Sorry, I think I needed to vent. My therapist went on vacation. Arg, I hate feel dependent on a person who could care less. I am just a client nothing more nothing less.
One other song I'm Weak-AJR. That song is the reason I texted my ex when I shouldn't. It just made things worse in the end. They are a ex for a reason. Leave them behind you.

I totally edited that and it didn't work quite like I wanted it too. That's frustrating. Is there any way to edit posts that have been posted.

 

[joeylittle]

@CaraG - direct questions to the help-tickets, thanks.

 

[EmmaOwl]

I totally edited that and it didn't work quite like I wanted it too. That's frustrating. Is there any way to edit posts that have been posted.

It can be frustrating... Think of it this way: It's a good, safe!, distraction from other frustrations.