Tired Of The Journey

[Tessa]

Thankyou so much for all your meassages of hope,prayers and hugs. I have just found out the boss is descending on us tomorrow so I guess not much sleep and nightrmares tonight. I will try to keep that candle of hope alight blown by the gentle breeze of all your kind thoughts.

 

[deer_in_headlights]

((((((((((Tessa)))))))))))

I respect and admire you, and care about you more than I can say...
My heart and prayers are with you!
May your candle of hope burn brightly for all to see, including at work!
You're not alone, many people love you, very, very much!!!
((((((((((Tessa))))))))))
Deer

 

[Tessa]

Tell me why I should not hang myself out of the tree??? This am the boss flew out and handed me a letter from the CEO telling me to get out. The reasons they stated are on the grounds of discrimination of PTSD when I was functioning well. Tried not to cry in front of the ...... Bullying is alive and well in its worst form.

 

[deer_in_headlights]

If you hang yourself, the bullies win...
You cannot let them do this...
Your life isn't about this job, your life is bigger than this, more meaningful than this, and I firmly believe that there is something even better for you ahead. This was a job where people were out to destroy you. they cannot do it.

You might be able to fight legally, or perhaps there is a job, a place for you where you are desperately needed and it's time for you to get to the ones who are hurting and you can help the most.

You have a beautiful, powerful, meaningful life ahead of you.
Sc*#w the bullies
Carry the good people in your heart, and Be,
and then when you've strengthened from this, be where you can make a powerful difference!
You'll be ok... better days are around the corner for you, Hon. The light is ahead, live fully in the light, shine bright, be a morning star to people around you... you are a healer, and there aren't enough, you are precious, unique and you have value and you are here for a reason. Don't deprive the world of your beautiful and much-needed light, love, gentleness, caring, healing...
There is a place for you...wishing peace into your heart...
((((((((((((((((((Tessa))))))))))))))))
Sending hugs and all my love,
Deer

 

[Tessa]

Thankyou Deer,I have calmed down a bit and cried a million tears and talked to 2 psychologists who encouraged me to grieve. Tomorrow is another day where my candle will shine..it is a bit waterlogged with tears ..but it will shine.

 

[deer_in_headlights]

(((((((((((((Tessa))))))))))))))
Weeping with you, reading your post...the grief runs deep, doesn't it...

I'm glad you're in contact with your psychologists!
I just had an image of you... (I used to be a diver and there are light flares that you can set off underwater, that are really bright and very impressive... I can see you holding one of those...)

You are already shining through your tears, Sweetheart! (((((((((((Tessa)))))))))))

You've got shoulders here, you can waterlog here as much as you need to.
Sending you my love and wishing you peace, comfort and renewed hope this day...
Deer

 

[Tessa]

Thankyou Deer, can't seem to stop crying and feeling humiliated and angry at the injustice. They state it is because my Dr certificate says fit for work but requires treatment from a psychologist.This is nothing new and had been the same for support for me since the assault in 2004.I think it is now about power over me rather than due process.
My friends on the forum keep me going and it is so good to be able to come here and cry knowing I will not be discarded.
Hugs..

 

[anni]

It's funny Tessa. I come here on mornings like today when I know seeing others feeling at the limits of their tolerance is going to absolutely make it tough to maintain but do it anyway. It keeps me going, reminds me how, that it's ok to cry and one just makes another day work. People here mean it-it's a lot of something.

Maybe today will be better. I hope so. Hugs, and thank you for being here.

 

[Tessa]

The candle flickers lightly...darkness beckons I am falling down and down past voices quoting rules and regulations past hands which will not reach out in care...there are no giants as I fall. Down into the welcoming darkness away from the spotlight of shame...no strength now to reach out..just curled up in a ball enveloped by the darkness...somehow comforting...

 

[deer_in_headlights]

(((((((((Tessa)))))))))))

Beautiful Tessa,
In shock, grief, shut-down, unable to think clearly tonight, but wanted to reach out with love...
I love you, please live

 

[Tessa]

Thankyou..I will live
Hugs to you Deer

 

[deer_in_headlights]

((((((((((Tessa))))))))))))

Thank you, Hon!
Breaking down into tears in relief... I couldn't bear to lose you, too...
I love you, Tessa
Thank you...
(((((((((((Tessa)))))))))))
All my love and care,
Deer