Trauma Quota

[OceanSpray]

*Not 100% sure that this was the right section.


So I did a dumb and watched a video on one of the worst tornadoes this country has seen even though I live in tornado alley and this has been an increeeeeedibly active season. . . So probably going to have nightmares tonight.

But it did make me start thinking.

Do you ever feel a little bit invincible because you’ve already gone through x amount of trauma? Like you’ve met your quota and so nothing can happen to you again? At least nothing large scale. . .

I realize this is a fallacy considering everyone has differing *amounts* and differing tolerance and all the other millions of factors that make this an idiotic thing to think. But I definitely have noticed that I’m overly cautious and anxious in some areas and in others I’m way more reckless and have a sense that *whatever* will never happen to me because xyz and abc already have.

 

[mszl]

I find myself very reckless and insensitive to danger. During my university years, I recall coming back home very late. Some group emerged in front of me. One of the guys shouted "I'm gonna f*ck this dude up!" and advanced towards me. Normal person would run in that situation, but I just continued to walk towards them. Dude grabbed me, and fortunately his buddies stopped him from beating the shit out of me - just ordered to "get the f*ck out of here". The stress hit me like hour later. I guess my stress and danger neurons are mostly fried from years of abuse and don't respond well. I don't think it's feeling invincible - rather avoiding the subject of stress.

 

[arfie]

no, i've never felt invincible for having survived so much trauma, but i have often felt suicidal enough to pursue risky activities in hopes of going out in glory.

for what it's worth
i worked out the last of my suicidal ideation chasing tornadoes in hopes of riding one to the next plane of existence. those suckers aren't as easy to catch as the safety freaks like to promote. i never did even get close. my tornado dreams are all in the pecos bill tradition. giddyup.

 

[elizabeep]

ive felt something like this before, for me though it feels less like invincible and more like indifference i guess? like as if i was a toy doll, i could be tossed around, damaged or whatever, as long as im still breathing then im "alive". but there's also times of the opposite, where even the smallest things feel like the end of the world. maybe it depends on how disassociated i am at the time?

 

[Friday]

I get fatalistic as f*ck when I hit my own personal quota of “too much”… but no. My life has taught me things can ALWAYS get worse, and everyone is capable of everything. I’m not exempt from that just because I DGAF in that moment.

 

[parrotthepolly]

I have felt invincible with emotional things and people's negative opinions, like people putting me down because all my trauma has been emotional abuse. But then again this doesn't happen a lot and I know other people take stuff like this to heart I just don't care at this point.

But I don't feel this way about physical danger.

ive felt something like this before, for me though it feels less like invincible and more like indifference i guess? like as if i was a toy doll, i could be tossed around, damaged or whatever, as long as im still breathing then im "alive". but there's also times of the opposite, where even the smallest things feel like the end of the world. maybe it depends on how disassociated i am at the time?

This is EXACTLY my mindset as well!

 

[Movingforward10]

I don't think it's feeling invincible - rather avoiding the subject of stress.

maybe it depends on how disassociated i am at the time?

Second these ^^

That was back in the day for me, closer to the time this trauma was happening.
It was less feeling invincible and more that it didn't matter what was happening or could happen.