Relationship Unbelievable

[Freida]

His therapist suggested social media to him to meet people so he could learn to talk to people so he could talk to me.

hmmmmm....this sounds odd.... ????

 

[blackemerald1]

@Tracee getting dumped by email must come just before the worst and that is dumped by text. Either way unnaceptable behaviour. I cannot accept that ppl who wish to self isolate bc of PTSD issues must be so contemptuous of a significant person they no longer want to be in a relationship with. It's unkind and unnecessary. I am so sorry this has happened to you.

I put the responsibility for your now ex's behaviour firmly at their feet. You may have issues and you may not have always behaved well. This does not mean you deserved to receive an email to terminate a relationship. If there was a violent history btwn you both - different story. But if there wasn't I don't get it. No justification from what you have detailed thus far.

I'd suggest you read something purely for distraction bc it is unlikely that it will really sink in right now. My mind wanders when I am upset and I can read entire books and not remember a word.

His therapist suggested social media to him to meet people so he could learn to talk to people so he could talk to me. The problem is it’s other women he’s talking to.

Have you started a thread on this? I agree with @Freida... very odd indeed. Do you really believe him? I'd suggest he's either in the marriage or he's not, working on it or not. It's a real world problem he has - how does this really help him and you? It's not the other women who are the problem Gemini83 - though they are a problem now it seems. It's him 'learning to talk to them' that is the problem and he's not talking the same language to them that he is talking to you?:sour:

 

[Gemini83]

I do believe him. He has a lot of anger and resentment directed at me. Two years ago when it was getting close for us to PCS, he had a flare. I didn’t realize it was as bad as it was. I didn’t know until last month that he had tried to kill him self. He never said a word. I asked if he wanted us to keep our plan or if he wanted us to go with him. He said to keep the plan. Later I tried to change it so we would go with, he refused again. He viewed my not going with him as leaving him when he needed me most. He spent the last two years in VA isolated in his apartment letting his resentment build, never saying a word about it. It came to a head one night when he went out drinking with some guys from work. He did what he considers an unforgivable act to force me to leave. I believe his guilt and shame are eating away at him which is causing the ebb and flow of his anger.
He needs to set boundaries and keep his anger under control. Talking to people he has no vested interest in that he can walk away from if it’s too much was the reasoning that was explained to me.
@Tracee, I apologize. I didn’t mean to hijack your thread.