Untreated Mental Illness In A Parent - Emotional Neglect

[sneakypanda]

Hello!
I am wondering if what has happened to me in life has happened to anyone else in this world! I...

I actually just came on here hoping that I wasn't the only one with Complex PTSD (not that I'd wish it on anyone) who wasn't really overtly sexually or physically abused. My mom has an untreated mental illness and was delusional for a good portion of my childhood, and I was her confidant and comforter. It really messes you up :(

 

[Tinyflame]

Most of the sexual stuff for me was outside the home, but supposedly neglect isn't so great. I really managed lots as a small kid though.

 

[Nevermore]

Yes @sneakypanda, I agree. It does mess you up. These days the social services are much more aware of the children in that situation, but in my day all you ever heard was "look after your mother"!!
I'm glad times have changed, but it's hard to sort yourself out when you've grown up with that as its all so unclear - what's fair or unfair when you're talking about someone with mental illness?
I used to envy people who could outright blame their parents.
Sounds crazy, but it always felt so free and clear to me rather than the murky mess of anger, grief, embarrassment, resentment, pity, self hate, confusion, love, pain, responsibility, resentment, rebellion, self hatred, guilt etc etc
And loneliness, always and forever loneliness because you had to grow up so fast and understand complicated adults things that many adults never have to face.

 

[Eleanor]

Emotional health, well being, is just not a "thing" for a lot of people. It is not that they don't know they lack it. It is that they don't know it is a possibility. And @Nevermore - I totally get that envy. After all, there is something WRONG there, but since there isn't when the issue is "just" emotional neglect... then what does one complain about? How does one explain the struggle and loneliness? Pain?