Went To Dr About Trauma Related Injury-

[OKRADLAK]

I had put this off for a year. VERY scary. In fact impossible. I am supposed to see him every year or so but I could not go for a long time.

Well, I went today. Am sore. I am hoping I do not go into full flashback like I have sometimes after these appts. One threw me off for almost a month.

So far, I am sore but OK. Whist there I had dissassociation very badly as I had to wait for almost an hour.

I am glad it is over, but of course, being sore makes me more vulnerable to flashback, self harm, etc...

So far, I am OK, but will be posting..................

 

[aditi]

Well done for going, and take good care of yourself while you're in a vulnerable state.

 

[OKRADLAK]

Thank you, aditi...I am still a bit shaky. This is one of the reasons it has been hard to heal from PTSD but maybe I can be strong for others who are injured in ways that can't be healed, but only managed or monitored. There are a lot of people out there who have constant reminders on their bodies, so I am trying to be strong. :)

 

[aditi]

Good for you, and it's lovely to hear that you want to be strong for others, when it already takes so much vigilance to care for yourself. It's one of the wonderful things about people who've been through trauma: their desire to be there for others. I was reading this morning that often a 'survivor mission' arises as we process the trauma and become more 'whole'. Until we're there, just not hurting ourselves any more is plenty.

 

[Heather]

Okradlak - this must have been very hard for you! I hope you're proud of yourself for doing this and recognizing that it takes a lot of courage to walk it there:)

AWESOME LADY!!!!

Hugs. Lots and lots of them. Heather