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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

I feel a little sad, dissapointed and lonely..ok abandoned. I'm nervous because of tomorrows meeting about the job, my bf don't even seam to be that glad. we ate and then he left with a friend almost 6 h ago...it's 11.47 pm and he just called and said he would not be home untill at least 2 am. Well I have to try to sleep...riding out my nervs on my own. I had hoped he would come home at least one hour ago. I just don't feel like he try to support me or belive I can make this. All he have said is " are you sure you can, well try and see how it will go?"... and then just eat dinner and left, did not even sound that loving as he use to when he just called. I feel I have to talk with him...about what's going on. I am just afraid of pushing him away by asking like it always seams to be like. I am worried abut him and what will become of us if this spiral down continues.
 
((((((((Incendiu))))))) It's really hard isn't to sleep when the one who is suppose to hold your hand is not there. At least you have this forum to come to and put your feelings down. We are here for you. Tomorrow is YOUR day..so give yourself a break from this and try to rest.
 
I completely understand about that nagging feeling. I feel abandoned today and nobody has abandoned me today. It's a hard feeling to get rid of. I'm 51 and still deal with that emotion. :O_o:
 
Tired and very sad. But I figured something important out. I have been having a "flare up." I've never been conscious of the before, during and after of it all. I caught glimpses of it this time and I'm glad about that new information and understanding that I have learned. I am sooo sad, though, that my family has had to put up with me without any of us knowing what was actually happening. I'm gonna write about this so that I can begin working on it. God only knows how much I would love to manage this better. I wish I could give up, but I never am able to-- "Hope" always shows up and ruins my demise.
 
I feel like I am being attacked from all sides. Extremely betrayed. Feel like finding a cave to hide in away from all humanity. I hate everything.
 
HAPPY! I will start my test period to a job in October when all details is in order. I feel great... I am nervous of course as it is a job depending on my abbility to be creative and sell my ideas. I feel like starting right now!

I also feel confident in how I handle stress as I had to do a test and I made it right from the start more calm and faster than anyone in the company and also showed a different way of solving the problem.

I feel like I have grown so much in my self just the past two days.

<Spelling corrected and paragraph breaks inserted by Amethist>
 
(Frustrated with this new itty bitty mini computer :speechless: but grateful because my hips and knees couldn't take the pain of the old laptop anymore. Wah...whine over!)

Anxeity ridden. I have to go to the "dr's" office this morning one last time then on to tdoc...calm...must get focused. I feel the knot in my gut...do I dissociate or risk reacting...am I in my self enough holding on to my knowledge without reverting to the deep rage within?? He is nothing but a hoop to jump through at this point, documentation, breathe and remember who you are, you are more than that!
 
Absolutely lazy as heck. It's pouring out and all I want to do is open all the windows and lay in bed and listen to the rain. I have a mountain of dishes that need to be washed but I think I will leave that chore to my husband today lol
 

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