What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

[KP the nut]

I am feeling very nervous over tomorrow and what will happen, preparing self for worst. If is the worst I may go into hiding for a while as it will really send my spiralling.

(((Sazza))), I will be with you in spirit. IMHO, the worst is the affect this may have on you. You, your health are what matters. I have faced what you face tomorrow, I lost, but I am so grateful I did. I did not realise the stress and pressure I was under.

It is not the end. Sending much strength.
KP

 

[Loveneverfails]

My muscles are screaming, I'm feeling a little strange emotionally with things that are going on...but over all I think today is a good day.

 

[AngelaMarie]

I am feeling so, so sad for Josh Powell's little boys. I can't believe how someone could do that to 5 and 7 year old little boys. My heart hurts so bad in this situation and it made me hug my boys tighter today and hope nothing bad ever happens to them. Gosh, the news sucks sometimes!:(:cry::cry:

 

[Loloma]

(((((AngelaMarie)))))

I can't get my head around it either why Josh Powell would do that to his boys. It is the ultimate act of selfishness. Unfortunately I happens far to often for various reasons. A lot of parents take the lives of their children in desperation. Some thinking "If I can't have them, nor will you". Josh Powell's situation was very different and more complex. It is very sad for the children, and the relatives that are left grieving.

 

[intothelight]

Sitting here and collecting my head for the day. Trying to prioritize as my energy is limited and I need to use what I have to hit the most critical areas. Each day I realize a little bit more about the impact this is going to have. I also realize a little bit more about the damage the years of constant anxiety have caused my body, brain, and relationships.

Funny, when I realized my time was short, the whole mental healing things has picked up a phenomenal pace. Everything I learned in therapy, here, and have read is just kicking in and major changes are occurring. I may end up being more mentally healthy than I have ever been. May not be a lot in what is described a "normal", but it is a hell of a lot better for me, from where I was. That is wonderful in and of itself.

 

[AngelaMarie]

Even today, Loloma, I am crying and hurting over them. The best thing I did in my life was my boys and to see those two little boys and know what happened is horrible for me. My 11 year old son got this look on his face and said to me "how could someone do that?" What can I say? There are true monsters in the world![/quote]

 

[KP the nut]

I am feeling excited about the Birmingham (UK) Get together on March 10th. 9 of us have replied we can attend, scarey but wonderful. I am also a bit worried as I need to find somewhere where we can go.

I am feeling good today, I didn't have the terrible nightmares last night so I feel more rested.

(((HUGS)))

 

[AngelaMarie]

KP, one day before my birthday. It will all be okay!:tup:

 

[Froggie]

TRIGGERED .... PTSD sucks more than cancer

 

[AngelaMarie]

Froggie, I wonder if there is anything on this earth that is worse than PTSD?!

 

[Srain]

((((((((((Froggie)))))))))))))(((((((((AngelaMarie)))))))))))

Didn't sleep well, struggling with Migraine. Appts set and off I'll go.
Thinking about the words here and how insightful everyone is, it's extremely appreciated. Sometimes the bubble of the ptsd brain feels like a planet all it's own.

 

[Loloma]

(((Froggie))) (((AngelaMarie))) Agree

I can't remember when I started suffering from PTSD. It started for me before I am can even remember. This is what happens when you are born to the wrong parents, rejected, traumatised and find abusers to carry it on. When you have to sit back and watch your siblings die horrifically and you are powerless to help them.

Unfortunately I still don't believe that I will ever be happy, that I am doomed to live with sadness and grief. With this horrible strange feeling of not belonging anywhere in the world. Struggling through each day, wondering what's it all about and is it worth it. I spent so many years living in suspended animation, years lost that melted together till I have reached this point. Now I look back in disbelief thinking, "what happened to my life". Such a waste. Except of course my wonderful sons.

I cry for the loss and waste that has been my life.