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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

This morning I can feel the depression trying so hard to grab me again. I am resisting it as hard as I can. I am trying to immerse myself in work, anything, whatever I can do to avoid it I am trying.

I am feeling so determined that I wont let it grab me today and pull me down. If I have to use avoidance techniques, so be it, I am so sick and tired of being so down.

So...
Today I am feeling sort of ok, but really pushing myself to try and feel good.
 
wishing I could breathe...guilty for causing my husband so much pain...guilty for not being able to take away his pain...frustrated that he can't at least TRY to understand me even a little bit and then accept me for who I am. Lonely. Scared. Sad. Feel like anything could set me off on a crying spree. I'm so tired of crying. Overwhelmed. Excited to see my therapist in an hour...
 
I am up and out of bed today!! Yesterday I was crushed by yet another Migraine but today I feel great! :) I took the fur Sisters for a drive to the store and a walk when we got home. I have the wash going and I have already made a few calls :D. It's so nice when I've only lost one day as opposed to a week!
 
Cried out...saw my therapist. She is wonderful! Validated everything I am doing. Told me that if I did let my husband back in to live with me that because of all his mental health issues, I would probably end up in the psych ward. Hmmm...get better or go to the psych ward. I think I'm going to choose to work on getting better even if it hurts him.

Excited to start EMDR in a month. She wants me more stabilized first. We're going to do two sessions back to back then skip a week and do two more back to back. We'll do that for two months. She said it will zap much of my strength and energy so to be prepared and make plans for that week to just lay low. But she said after a few sessions, I will start to feel better. She said it's like a fog will be lifted and I can start to make proper decisions and will be able to look at life through different eyes (not my usual PTSD eyes) :tup:
 

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