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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

So much right now.

Fear, self-loathing, and hopelessness are what I think I'm feeling. Weekends are usually rough for me. I stay somewhere where my anxiety is always high, and I'm constantly being triggered. That's part one of the fear. The self-loathing also stems from that, I feel that I'm so worthless not being able to handle two days a week here, not being able to communicate with the other people here, and that I'm not dealing with my issues fast enough. I'm also feeling pathetic for holing myself in a room and hiding under the covers of the bed when I'm panicking.
The other half of all those feelings has to do with tomorrow... I have a date with someone. I was looking forward to it, but now I'm just focusing on all my flaws and justifying all the reasons he won't like me enough to want anything more to do with me. *sigh*
 
(((((LiamM)))))

Exhausted. After last night's scare, I now have all 3 kids at home. My son is fine, happy and chatty. Made bircher muesli and eggs for breakfast.

Ex H phoned me up complaining about his back (that suddenly started playing up when my son was in the hospital so he could get some attention I suspect). He arrived here late afternoon doing the invalid act, but has finally taken them to the park for a little bit.

No rest for me this weekend, and the week is full on next week, plus I now have a whole load more medical appointments to try and get sorted.

No time to have a nervous break down then :(
 
((((((((((Lizio))))))))))))((((((((((Loloma)))))))))))))((((((((((Liam))))))))(((((((Sazza))))))))

Woke with a sore throat, blech. More sad news last night of family passing, my husband seems to take it in as "this is life" and I stumble into heartbreak, like walking on glass shards. :cry: How can two people react so differently?

Had a really good day yesterday :) - how great is that! AND my Hunny has tickets to an event for us in April, I'm sooo excited, we try to do something each year that is awesome to us and this one rocks! We will be up in the nosebleed seats and probably won't be able to see a thing but hey! we will be there :tup:
 
I feel so ill today, i am going back to bed my mood is on the floor and i just feel in constant state of dissociation as i can't handle everything right now. I just want to curl up and never have face anyone again.

Hugs to all, be back around soon when feeling better but for now the dark hole is getting deeper.
 

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