What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

[KP the nut]

I am feeling good again today. H and I have a few days off work together and we have spent the day pottering around the house - todays little job involved sorting through old bedding.

I am proud that when H asked if I wanted to walk the dogs with him this morning I went.

(((HUGS))) to all.

 

[SweetPeaandSunBird]

(((Loloma))) please take care as you also try to help your friend's wife.

***
I'm terribly sad, rough week, but I'm moving around (so that's good).

***
Best hopes for all today.

 

[Spiderallis]

I was doing pretty okay, then a surprise trigger popped up and now I might cancel out of evening plans to fight off a flashback or at least avoid anyone witnessing it. I feel like such a let-down, even though the person I'm letting down disagrees. Anxiety derailed plans for a nice dinner out. Emotions are making me feel ill because I don't know how to feel them any other way. Not sure if I'm even up to the more relaxed alternate plan, very disappointed in myself. The inner critic is screaming and making it even harder to pull together enough to be around anyone.

 

[Britt.f7]

Spiderallis, please try not to allow those negative voices win. I know how difficult this is, but it does not help the matter at hand. (yes, I should follow my own advice). I'm glad the person you had plans with is being supportive. That is the definitely the type of person you need right now. You are worthy. Please, please, please, do not be disappointed in yourself. The fact that you recognize what is happening and you are doing your best to take care of yourself. That is a positive move.

Try not to go this alone. I apologize if I have stepped out of line. I wish you the compassion I feel for you right now.

 

[KP the nut]

I'm feeling satisfied, it has been a good day and is almost time for bed now.

 

[Britt.f7]

A little lonely.

 

[Loveneverfails]

So tired and annoyed that no matter how much sleep I get, I'm still exhausted. I will sleep most of tomorrow to see if it makes a difference. I think the nightmares are taking my quality of rest.

 

[Springer80]

I'm struggling. Have been for weeks. I feel like what exactly is the point of carrying on if you never reap what you want because however hard you try you cant or don't know or are too dissociated from what you need to sow.And I'm not talking monetary, I'm talking love and acceptance.

I'm sorry I don't like feeling or expressing cynical stuff but I'm struggling with this. I've litearlly been reduced to a stale mate and I have no idea what to do to move in the right direction.

I may as well be locked up. I'd probably have more contact with people.

 

[Springer80]

I just want to understand. I'm tired.

 

[ms spock]

I am better today. Yesterday was tough. I got through and did the things I needed to do. I was very clear, in a non nasty way with B, how much the whole Birthday thing effected me. He says he won't make that mistake next year. I told him that I wouldn't be coming up for Xmas this year. That was enough for one year and he doesn't really have control over this Xmas as he and his Dad spend one year at home and the next year at friend's. They are okay people but they are not my friends and I don't need the complication of staying at unknown people's places for Xmas. I just want to vege this year. I got my Kris Kringle present this week and that lifted my spirits to no end. I feel like I need a lot but I don't - one present makes such a difference - all that love and care from the other side of the world.

I am still pretty frozen. It feels weird.

I am going to focus on cleaning my house today and take some time out. I was going to have a little Birthday lunch today but I cancelled yesterday as I am not up for it. I need to do those household things that need to be done. So that is what I am going to do today.

I feel better a little overwhelmed about working on the frozen part of me. But at least I got to see that this week with clarity so I am feeling lucky about that.

This is the first day of the rest of my life...so time to make a move on that.

Feeling for everyone today. Lomola - take care!

 

[Britt.f7]

Ms. Spock, it is great that you were able to stand up for what you want to do this coming holiday. I wish I could do the same thing, mine is with my family. I'd really rather not. It is nice you are taking care of you.

 

[ms spock]

I'd really rather not.

It is hard to be in your situation Britt.f7.

This has been a practice thing. I spent many years doing what I didn't want to do at a great cost to me and now I am not doing this. It was a lot of learning and making mistakes.

Now, after the effects of my Birthday stuff, I am not going to put myself through anything else significant this year. I will keep on working on myself, on a daily basis, of course. I will do my assessments and etc as well. I will keep on turning up to my committments, inspite of how I am feeling.

But I won't put myself through so much stress again. I trusted and it didn't work out. So enough for now.

It is good that I am I looking after myself! Thanks for reminding me of that!