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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

I am feeling apprehensive, distressed, and somewhat guilty. And like Hope said, irritated with myself. I feel a sense of dread, too, because I don't want to go to sleep.
 
I feel guilty for my choices, selfish because I don't/won't/can't(?) give more. Ashamed I still haven't healed after all this time, like I've shirked my duty.
 
I am feeling tearful because I can't figure out what I am feeling - but it is an uncomfortable feeling - anxiety and shame and guilt for making someone feel bad this morning when all I was trying to do was figure out if I was feeling my own tension or somebody else's. Frustrated at not knowing what this feeling is and trying to double guess myself and others to figure it out. Disappointed that i am not doing better today - I so badly need to do better today. Disappointed at realising that one day of better, doesn't mean better forever. Angry that I thought it might.
 
OK, don't hate me, but I'm having a good day today ;P I feel positive, good, peaceful and generous. I think it is mostly this group that has done this for me. If I haven't said it yet today, thank you Anthony for creating this oh-so-useful beast, and thank you to you all for your truth.

Shiraz, I know that feeling so well of, "I had a good day, everything's going to be so much better from now on", only to wake up in the toilet the very next day. I track my good days on the calendar. Over the past 3 months, I can see improvement, more good days, less tragic ones. It's slow, but it's happening for you too.
 
A-Z

I'm running the gambit today, this week, this month...depending on what I'm thinking about at any given time. Each thought has it's own life.

I had an organized fit the other night...just angry. Had to get it out of my system so I could put it behind me. This resulted in me busting open a pillow by beating it on the bed for over an hour. Then, angry that the pillow gave out on me, grabbed a bath towel and continued until I had it all out of my system.

My suffer hubby wasn't quite sure what to make of it because it was so totally out of character for me, that he just retreated to Warcraft (the bane of 75% of my anger) and left me alone, once he'd determined that I wasn't doing damage to myself or the bedroom.

Needless to say....I feel much better now!! :rofl:

Hugs all around,
Robyn
 
Feeling very emotional, kind of shitty actually. I had an appointment with my nuero-psych today. We were talking about my having more good days lately, a book she recommended, etc, etc. But my family came up a few times in the back of my head, and near the end it just sort of overcame me.

I got a lot of criticism and sarcasm, and a down right disdainful look from one of my sisters at Thanksgiving. I've talked about it with other people, but there's something about my nuero-psych, she's been with me through so much, I can't choke the feeling off like I can talking to others.

I got emotional and teary, there's such a resonance with the way I felt all the time growing up, only then I buried those feelings beneath a constantly tended bonfire of anger. Well, now it's just difficult feelings to let myself feel.

I am a little proud of myself though, I didn't let it turn into self pity, I didn't try to avoid feeling it or alter or "repair" the idea or the memories and turn it into anything other than what I was feeling. And, it didn't run away with me, or rather I didn't run away with it.
 
I am actually feeling HAPPY today! We had a lovely first anniversary dinner last night (best food I have had since our reception), and came home and watched some Lord of the Rings. It was a great evening. And I took .5mg Lunesta, and slept fairly well for over 9 hours...even the suspenseful dreams were kinda benign. It's nice to actually be in a good mood this morning :smile:
 

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