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Iam, I hope I am not the one that caused you to feel that way...
I feel absolutely out of control today. Many big and small panic attacks. I feel abandoned alone and I feel like a child. I am freaking lost.
No, it wasn't you at all Nighthawlk. It was nice to help talk you down. No, my friend pointed out that today is Thursday. Now that sounds like a weird reason doesn't it? But it is typical. I usually react 2 days after my therapy sessions which are on Tuesdays. Strange how consistant it is. I guess it just takes me that long to process our discussion. Plus I had some revelations last night. Not bad ones really, more interesting than anything. I did wake up a couple of times last night shaking uncontrollably, but was able to go right back to sleep. Which is good, normally I am up for a couple of hours in the middle of the night. Even so I probably didn't sleep quite as well as I thought and obviously it was a tension filled sleep which left me exhausted today. So no worries, I was glad to be able to help you today ;o)
Lonely, horribly lonely. Afraid I've turned all my friends off by being too negative and withdrawing when they wanted to hang out. Afraid to tell them why and afraid not to tell, because then they'll just think I don't care.
I like this feeling too. After a vigorous session of yard work, or light landscaping. Today I am feeling grateful for a lot of things including this forum, my friends and my many blessings.