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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

Frustrated for two reasons. One is because my illness is acting up and there is nothing I can do to alleviate the symptoms, just ride with it. And, two, because I went to the nurse practitioner today to find an alternative to Abilify due to cost, and she prescribed me an alternative that is just as much. So I will have to call her on Monday to tell her I won't be taking that. I did say to pick something older so that it didn't cost as much. Well that didn't work out for me.
 
Physically - in pain - my neck is screaming and stomach is burning, and I'm still fat. yuck!
Mentally - unstable and afraid - It's grueling and exhausting. On the plus side, if I can keep my attention focused for longer than that of a gnat, I am going to try to start reading the Feeling Good Handbook, or maybe I'll just color.
Spiritually - double-minded - trying to stand in my faith, and believe in the promises and what I know to be the truth, and let go of the corporeal need to control outcomes while trusting in grace instead.
 
Finally read my nephew's instant message. He still insists that I say everything he says is wrong. I told him that is not true. I just have different views. I told him I will no longer respond to his posts. That it makes me sad. Shed my last tear.

Other than that I feel good. My boys went and helped me pick out a tree today. It was the first one we saw. It is so cute, and even smaller then we usually get. Can't wait to decorate it. :)
 
Some degree of cautious relief, thankful, grateful, nauseous, vulnerable, can't sleep extreme pain in head, neck, stomach, back & shoulders, but those aren't such a big deal for me. So nice however, thoughts dialed down. Kept thinking other men's voices in stores etc friday & yesterday were the voice of a stranger very angry with me last sunday (justified). Wish I could shake it, feel unprotected, & very tired.

Hoping I can put up Christmas tree today.. ? :inlove:

I love peace. Well joy & safety & security too, or hope are wonderful too, but peace= feels easier on the heart. Very grateful to wake up without extreme fear (unrelated to Christmas season).

I think the most important things in life are peace, love, truth, & protecting & helping one another, God, loved ones, people, beloved animals & nature. I think that brings joy. JMHO though.

I'm very tired, & inclined to fears because of the past. I was told God made me with a big heart. It feels sore (literally) but grateful. :notworthy:
 
Feeling very defeated, sad and at times very hopeless. There are very valid reasons in the present to feel tired, anxious and sad, but the feelings of defeat and loss of hope are the start of depression. I am also aware this depression is a combination of seasonal and situational, and I do know what I need to do to counteract the effects. Just find myself so tired to trying and working so hard just to exist at a level that approximate something of normal.

@Junebug Thank you for the reminder as I really need to focus my attention here and stop gazing at the bottom.

I think the most important things in life are peace, love, truth, & protecting & helping one another, God, loved ones, people, beloved animals & nature.
 

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