What Has Ptsd Cost You?

[Heather]

I can relate all too well to this. Especially with having a hard time paying bills. Things get shut off and then I find that I have no choice but to pay them if I want service back again. Some luckily (like car insurance) are on automatic withdrawal each month.

Or even how to be responsible....it's a struggle.

Although, I would like to add that I DID pay my cell phone bill this month on time. I did this so my daughter could have spare phone and if needed I'd be able to call her when she's out and about. Small step but progress none the less.

 

[EveHarrington]

If it was so simple as forgetting the past and looking forward, PTSD wouldn't exist, this site wouldn't exist, we'd all be fine.

If someone is missing out on something then it is indeed healthy to process those feelings, mourn, and then be able to move forward.

Looking back=action.
Sad over loss=feeling.

Assumption is that the action of looking back is causing the sad feelings.

Incorrect assumption IMHO.

The feelings are there regardless.

 

[The Albatross]

Depressively looking back is an aspect, yes... but it also at times is a choice.

 

[Ronin]

I tend to flip this one. Two ways:

What has the thing not cost me?
&
What it cost me, how am I getting it back?

It's when it doesn't fall into either of those areas (something I can go without, or something I can get back) that I throw fits & hit reverse.
Not asking that today. Asking something else.

 

[Tinyflame]

@Cashew yes.

Maybe also to say 'What do I have'?

@Bloomy , it escapes me 'who' or 'when' but someone just wrote recently about seeing themself in the way of taking a new picture/ pictures of themself. Can anyone remember which thread?..

 

[Friday]

Incorrect assumption IMHO

It's not an assumption. It's a statement of fact; I was very clearly describing my own self, & my own processes in answer to the question "What have you lost & how do you overcome this?"

I never said anything about forgetting the past.
I never said what I do is simple.
I never said that not focusing on what I've lost affects PTSD whatsoever.

And while there are many other things in what you wrote that are not true for me, the most glaring is that the feelings are there, regardless. That might be true for you, but it couldn't be further from the truth, for me.

Your entire series of assumptions about what I wrote is wrong.

 

[Blessed84]

I lost:
My self esteem
My childhood
Trust
Some family and friends
Finishing my degree
Jobs
Places I have lived
Learning life skills
How to have and cope with emotions appropriately

Although some of these things are being gained slowly through therapy I still grieve occasionally for what was lost. And some of it I can never get back.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Does everything work? Too many to list.

 

[schmidt.aander]

It felt like the past years as Ive started to come out of a dense fog. It still does. Inbetween my days...

I can completely relate to how you feel.

Instead of thinking about what I've lost, as I recover, I think about what I've gained and continue to master. Most of us don't have the basic life skills and I think, as we remove ourselves further from trauma, we're raising ourselves, in a way - teaching ourselves how to live in a new mind and body, particularly if our traumas stem from childhood. As my symptoms have begun to subside, I find myself in a state of constant evolution - growing exponentially, learning, accepting and realizing things about myself that I never knew or thought possible. That's not to say that it's never overwhelming. That doesn't imply that it doesn't come with its own set of fears and anxieties, but I acknowledge that literally every time I wake up, I'm different than the day before. Stronger, wiser, more self-aware; even on days that aren't the best.

I think it's important to accept that you are changing, to embrace what's coming for you and to be easy on yourself that you won't get a million new things at once. When flood gates burst we have no idea what to do with the water, but we find a way to make it work for us. Allow yourself this objectivity and welcome these new avenues, as stressful as they may be. You are becoming and that is the best gift of all.

 

[Freedomfighter]

It felt like the past years as Ive started to come out of a dense fog. It still does. Inbetween my days...

PTSD will cost a lot, it certainly affects health, it took my innocence, my childhood, but I would like to train myself to somehow reach a new equilibrium.

 

[schmidt.aander]

PTSD will cost a lot, it certainly affects health, it took my innocence, my childhood, but I wou...

I didn't say that PTSD doesn't take. My intentions instead were to give a different perspective, to potential alter cognition. I wouldn't invalidate anyone's experience, but it seem as if marinating in the negative, flipping and restructuring thoughts can really be helpful.

 

[Bloomy]

@schmidt.aander - well written
@Freedomfighter I like equilibrium