What if

[sonicwhite]

My nightmare theme is always this. PPl being chopped up... Speared some sort of nasty death of some sort. How can my dads physical abuse come out like that unless a very scary psychosis where i was stuck in jail and thought I was going to get my head cut off if I didn't receive the Mark of the Beast.

I've had other dreams of the end of the world. Why is this the main theme. It's almost like I can't even look at a Military base without freaking out.

So I was wondering. With all the XTC trial's What if your PTSD was trigger in part by a bad trip from XTC that through you into a psychosis. Granted there are other drugs involved but I for one could never use it again and don't think I'll ever benefit from something I could abuse so easily.. Now that's not discounting the numerous success they have seen with phase 2. I think I would be the exception..

 

[Deleted member 12723]

With all the XTC trial's What if your PTSD was trigger in part by a bad trip from XTC

I do not know but when I first started therapy, I was always having end of the world dreams and I had them also as a child too. But then they stopped and picked pack up many years later. I do not think that PTSD could come from a bad trip on XTC. It is caused by trauma as far as I know and even then not everyone who is traumatized gets PTSD. Hope this makes some sense.

 

[sonicwhite]

I don't understand. I do not know why my dreams are so twisted.

 

[sonicwhite]

What if my dads abuse was latent and popped up when I thought i was going to die a horrible death in jail.? Kist food for thought. I talked to someone in real life with Military PTSD. He said a lot of things can cause PTSD. Just saying.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

It may be so, but I doubt seriously that drugs could cause it. It is not a life or death situation. Maybe a bad trip but it wears off and you go back to normal. Just sayin

 

[sonicwhite]

It's been since 2012. Don't think it's healing.

 

[sonicwhite]

I meant 2005

 

[sonicwhite]

I was smoking meth, doing POT XTC perc's Lortabs and shrooms. I finally went over the edge and was convince I gave my ex HIV. So I called the cops and told them I gave her HIV. The cops came down on me and I was sent to jail. Got out five days later and took five XTC pills cuz I wanted to die. This time I thought I was in the dawn of the dead movie.

I go to a gas station and make a scene. The cops come a beat the crap out of me.. I'm sent back to jail and was possibly raped. Had my blood taken and shot in both forearms with a jet injector. Probably Thorazine. Anyways before the lights were out i Thought they were taken me to the top floor and going to chop me up and throw me off the building.

This is why I stress that it wasn't your normal psychosis were you lose it and go to the psychward for five days. I was in jail two and half months. Thought everyone was getting the mark of the beast or either chopped up and fed as food to the other inmates before it was their turn to be tortured.

If that ain't traumatic I don't know what is.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

It sounds to me like your experience in the jail was very traumatic. Maybe flashbacks too?

 

[sonicwhite]

Yup

 

[sonicwhite]

But hey if clean XTC works go for it. I'm just the exception

 

[Deleted member 12723]

i thought that you were just talking about really twisted nightmares and a really bad trip on drugs. Now that you have filled in the blanks my heart goes out to you and your dreams make sense compared to your trauma.