What is Emotional Flooding?

[Fawnie]

Sometimes self care is triggering. I told my husband in couples counseling yesterday that I may need a period of separation since he often unintentionally hurts me and I just need a safe place. It was so hard to say that it started the flooding process but I'm starting to recognize the signs and took the medications and practiced the grounding techniques that I know and was able to not let it get out of control. That was empowering! I like the sunglasses idea Srain and totally identify with the sense of vulneralbilty Muse.

 

[Fawnie]

I was wondering Srain if you could get some beads of a similar color and make yourself something to wear or carry in your pocket? ( Going back to your T's nameplate). Still working on whether or not to separate. I care so much for other people and it's so hard to care for me.

 

[mamachick]

For me the emotional flooding comes from more everyday events that are triggers to my trauma issues, but not the direct thoughts themselves, not after talking about it in therapy, or journaling, or these posts.

I tend to think in shades of gray, I am not a black and white thinker. I see all the areas in between the black and white. I dont think people are "good or bad" and see all the in between. When I have experienced the emotional flooding, it includes anxiety that someone mentioned but not a panic attack. The panic is that I feel like fighting and giving up at the same time, I feel anger and empathy at the same time, I feel totally right and totally wrong at the same time. And as others has said, for me, it has lasted hours and afterwards I am exhausted.

My coping skills are in need of critiquing badly, so I have been known to vent strongly, uncomfortable and dont even know what I want-I want to leave and I want to stay. Once I took a hammer to a bannister I refinished in my house during an episode and then cried and felt remorseful. (My ex husband had said-"that is my house") and that was the trigger for me. Others would not understand my interpretation of that and its unimportant. Its like anger meets fear for me.

 

[Tinyflame]

Yes brat- good point: not just intensity but many emotions (at once).
And not a panic attack but 'thoughts' (and feelings), and not being sure of what to do or think, what conclusion is 'right'.
And the physical component of it (while feeling lousy).

-Eiy, am at a loss for words today, but you describe the 'indescribable' well.

 

[surviving_it_all]

I never knew that what I was experiencing was emotional flooding. I hate it. Its horrible to experience. Hyperventilation is my only relief. Too much pain all at once.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I used to wear sunglasses everywhere. It really helps out so very much. I felt safer, they could not see my eyes. I still to this day do not know why wearing sunglasses inside and outside comforted me. This is a great thread. Thank you.

 

[isabellaesho]

I spent 45 minutes on the phone last night with my doctor and she said what was going on was emotional flooding. Once I finally got through it and got some sleep, I woke up at 230am and couldn't go back to sleep. I drank camomile tea, and tried to make myself read, but felt it coming back again.

So I decided to google "emotional flooding" and it brought me to this discussion, which is a few years old. I am not sure what will happen if I join in the discussion at this point in time, but I thought I would give it a try. I appreciate everyone's posts and am glad to know that I am not alone.

I have been dealing with PTSD symptoms my whole adult life, and I am in my late 40s, but I have never had this experience before the last few months. It is a complete physical panic, but it goes on for hours, so to me I don't think it's an anxiety attack, which I think is usually shorter in duration, but maybe I am wrong.

I don't think I can go back to sleep now before my alarm clock goes off in 2 hours, but I feel calmer having read all of your posts, and I am hoping someone will respond to this one.

I am new to forums like this and don't really understand how it works yet. Thanks.

 

[seekpeace]

So I think this is what I have been experiencing for a while but more intensely recently as I try to work through my trauma. I am living with my parents right now (I am 25 with my big trauma having occurred when I was 21) and doing a lot of therapy and work in hopes that I can find lasting healing, but as I work through everything it seems I am experiencing more emotional flooding. And it often seems like little things trigger it that I don't even understand. Like just being in a room with too many people. Or my dad asking me if I am ok. I would say my experience is similar to what Brat17 described a few posts earlier.

But how to deal with people who want to help but for some reason that I can't explain end up making it worse is where I am wondering if anyone has any advice. My father is a very caring person and I understand his need to somehow show he cares and support me through this time and he always picks up on it when I am feeling flooded, although he usually doesn't know what has triggered me, and the frustrating this is I often only have a vague idea myself what might have triggered me. The problem is that his desire to care and help and even his simple questions of are you ok seem to just send me over the edge. We have been struggling with this dynamic the last couple months but it seems to be getting worse recently. Maybe I am in a even more sensitive space or something but I feel myself pulling away more, trying to avoid the triggers and that just makes him want to reach out and connect more.

One therapist I am working with suggested that together we could maybe come up with a way for him to show he cares and for me to acknowledge that I know he is there if I need him that doesn't trigger me. And he is also asking me to help him find a way to support me that feels ok for me but the problem is I don't know what would work. When I am in that space it feels like almost any verbal connection will just send me to tears that I won't be able to stop. Someone suggested some kind of physical contact, a hug a squeeze around the shoulders, a pat, something... but I can't really imagine a way of that working and not sending me over the edge too.

Has anyone found a helpful way for people close to you to be there for you in these situations that doesn't somehow just lead to more emotional flooding? Any suggestions would be much appreciated.

 

[EmotionalMystic]

I have experienced emotional flooding (and PTSD) for over 40 years. I understand deeply the feeling that you are being crushed and or exploding inside and how unbearable it can feel. You want to hide it because no one understands. Yet you feel alone. Often you want to die..yet you don't!

I have studied it now for 13 years via therapy, mindfulness meditation and psychology books. It is caused when something happens that is so shocking/confusing you are flooded with too much emotion. To protect you your mind walls this experience/emotion (now connected) off in your brain. However it keeps coming up so you have an opportunity to begin healing and processes this rift/split.

How do you heal it? In order to heal you must understand it is a mind-body connection. So just talking will not heal it. You need to find a way to keep your autonomous (nervous) system calm while the emotion is there. One way is mindfulness meditation. Which works but slowly. A faster way I've found is emotional freedom technique (also called EFT or tapping). Google it on youtube. You can learn it there free. It looks weird but it has transformed my life because it breaks the connection between the memory/emotion.

It is not a magic bullet, esp if you have multiple trauma experiences to heal as I do. But I can now enjoy a loving intimate relationship and before I was always too triggered to do that. Many other miracles have happened as well. I was disassociated all my life, no core identity, and now I'm "here" and I have a sense of self. I still struggle with flooding but now I have tools that work, and it improves every year. I don't take any medications because I want to feel the emotions so I know when to meditate or tap on them to clear them. This is not necessary though. You can still meditate and do EFT while taking medications.

PTSD has been a struggle but also a gift. My last decade of meditating on/observing the fear, sadness, anger etc has given me deep compassion for others and the ability to help people process and understand trauma. This is the life work of many people...to heal their own trauma, and love themselves and life again. This can be cleared. Try it. It's free and you have nothing to lose. Do it about 20 times before deciding whether or not it works. It isn't fast, but it really works. You will notice small shifts happening within a couple weeks of doing it daily (faster if your trauma is a one off event--I experienced years of complex abuse so it takes longer). I still do about 30 min of meditation and 30 + minutes of tapping/EFT a day. Don't give up. You were born to love and enjoy being you. Xo

 

[Lorraine245]

A good article I just found:
How to understand emotional flooding by Sarah Kreece

Also: a mindfulness technique to just repeat: "fading away"

Also: breathe very deeply in and out 5 times

Also: my daughter gave me a little smooth rock that someone had painted a few tiny rough dots on, so you keep the stone in your pocket and rub the stone when you feel anxiety

Most of all: learning something really hard that is physical and mental like jazz piano has helped me more than anything; also playing the drum set. This engages your physical, emotional and intellectual realms in a way that takes away your pain and helps engage your mind on something creative while also getting that physical in there. Writing poetry is great, too, but not as physical.

The first four years of my life were extremely traumatic and when I became a mom, I had PTSD and a really dark set of years. I made it through. I work on myself all the time. Of course, when major stresses happen, then all kinds of things get triggered. My husband has Parkinson's now. So I am going through so much and emotionally flooding constantly in all kinds of bizarre and familiar ways.

Thanks to everyone for sharing. I feel less alone now, and that helps. I woke up the other night and I thought I was dying from a heart attack, but it must have been an anxiety attack. I also started thinking about something today while I was writing in my journal and then like 3 minutes later "came to" in a panic because the thread of my associative thoughts was so rapid, I couldn't trace how I got from point A writing in my journal all the way to high stress panic at point Z -- it was so weird. Just trying to give myself a break.

We are all doing the best we can, and being this way at least allows us to have a level of empathy so badly needed now as so many people are suffering....take care everyone.