Poll What Is The Workplace Really Like For Employees With PTSD?

[PTSD and Me]

I think you're right Anna. I have heard that abusive people can detect people like us people they think are weak) and they tend to single out the ones they think can be pushed around. What happened to you at work last week?

I don't know whether I think it's and asset or a liability, but I have heard from my therapist that I am a little different than many women with PTSD. I will be nice to a point, but when I have reached my limit, I don't care what happens, the fit's going to hit the shan (so to speak). My present boss was quite a bully when we first started working together and I put up with her for a few months knowing full well that she was just talking the talk and couldn't back it up. She told me not to question her or I wouldn't want to know what would happen to me. She would come up and yell at me (sending my startle reflex into overdrive) and then walk away shaking her head to let all observers know she thought I was an idiot.

The day I got sick of her, she had done three things in 12 hours and I was ready to throw down with her. I went into her office, closed the door, and asked ina low voice if I could have her attention. She tensed up, (I could tell she was a little nervous that she was locked in a small room with me and at that point I thought she was probably correct to be nervous - though I knew I was certain that nothing physical wold happen, I don't think she knew it). The conversation that followed was a total power struggle, and varied from talking in a calm low (but unmistakeably angry) voice, to yelling. I started calmly, she escalated to yelling and cursing at me, so I followed suit with her. At the end, she was crying. And I wasn't sorry. I was ready to lose my job if that's what it took, but if she wanted to feel like a big bad bully, she better make sure she had the internal fortitude to back it up. She didn't. Most bullies seem to be even more insecure than those of us that know we have problems. I don't get that.

Now I have a new interesting situation to contend with, I am a member of the Employee with Disabilities Resource Group at work, and they want to have people who are comfortable be a part of a panel to discuss their disability and how it effects them and others at work. I volunteered to speak about PTSD (that group always makes me feel so safe and accepted). A lot of people I work with directly know I have PTSD, but this would be giving an hour long presentation in front of an auditorium full of people I work among. I want to push the boundaries and prove that people who are competent and respected can be working with something like PTSD and not be ashamed of it. But this might require a bit more bravery than I expected when I volunteered...

 

[Anna]

I think you're right Anna. I have heard that abusive people can detect people like us people they think are weak) and they tend to single out the ones they think can be pushed around. What happened to you at work last week?

Well, I judged a collegue wrong. I trusted them and this was a BIG mistake.

Wow, that is great what you did with your boss. I did this also awhile back with another collegue. I snapped one day and shouted at her. She was on the same level as me not above so I shouted real loud. She saw the bad side. She now shakes in my presence and is nervous around me. Bullies are weak indeed.

I had one supervisor many many years ago who tried to set me up at work. She told me to put a customer order into the wrong system. I was new at the time and was not aware of it. I was also very young and naiive. Next day, boss came to me and told me off. I saw this supervisor watching what was happening. There was no evidence to show that she had told me to do it. My paranoid alarm bells went off. So I apologised about the mistake and said it would never happen again, I was new didn't know etc etc... Boss was happy I said sorry, supervisor stormed off angry. She thought I would blame her and then of course would say she never told me that....... People are really really sick.

 

[PTSD sufferer]

Great.. I guess the bullies realise when you are weak.

Hi Anna,

Workplace bullying has very little to do with victims being weak. They tend to target those that are very competent, strong, and ethical people. Sometimes, you are just in the wrong place at the wrong time. But, it has more to do with the bully's insecurities and incompetence.

Tim Fields website 'Bully Online' is a really good source of information and understanding as to why bullies are what they, and provides a description of the traits of victims of bullying. It was very enlightening for me to read his work.

[DLMURL]http://www.bullyonline.org/workbully/bully.htm[/DLMURL]

I posted some time ago on another thread about the laws against workplace bullying and harassment. Companies don't tend to promote these laws (other than general compliance codes in codes of ethics and conduct), but it can be empowering if you are being bullied and harassed to know that law does exist and you have rights.

[DLMURL]https://www.ptsdforum.org/c/threads/horizontal-workplace-violence-and-bullying.20494/#post-313401[/DLMURL]

Have a read of the posts for relevant information and links to more information.

Love, PS xxoo

 

[PTSD sufferer]

So how do I handle it when I am the boss -or at least s supervisor of a handfull of people?

Hi Joe Navy,

You should consider yourself an 'authentic leader with emotional intelligence'.

Don't let it worry you that you had an panic attack in front of the employee. By crying, all you did was show that you are a 'human being' and not a machine, I think that's a good thing.

Managers are not super-man clones, and if you do a google search for 'emotional intelligence' you will find that it is a much sought after trait in management, and a trait that you already have :)

 

[PTSD and Me]

I haven't read Steve Jobs' biography yet, but I heard he never thought twice about having a fit if something was wrong and he would burst into tears in board meetings with some regularity. I'm not sure that's the best approach, but it would be hard to argue that it hurt his success...

 

[kesava]

I am reading this forum in utter amazement and cannot stop reading. Never knew there were so many out there with similar work experiences to my own as a result of PTSD. One of the hardest things for me has been learning that this "illness" never goes away. It may be in remission but once you have it, it can be triggered at any time. While that explains a lot for me, it is still difficult to accept.

My employment situation has been extremely difficult due to my PTSD and an abusive boss. It took almost getting fired for me to go above my his head. After doing so, he was put on written notice, i.e. if his behavior didn't stop, he would be let go. So, his treatment of me has improved, but there is still an underlying anxiety (for me) that he could turn on me at any moment. After reporting him, I got into therapy to help me deal with this difficult person and give me some strategies for the workplace. (Leaving the job was not an option for me.)

I had come to "blame" my problems at work (lateness, forgetfulness, lack of focus, anxiousness and confusion about what was expected on certain projects) on what I was sure was adult onset ADHD. I got tested because I was told I needed an "official" diagnosis in writing. I was convinced the testing would confirm this "self-diagnosis." I was not prepared for the resulting diagnosis the clinic provided. Since then, I've learned that sufferers of PTSD can exhibit ADHD-like symptoms.

Now I am trying to decide if I should present the formal letter to my employer, which is what lead me to this forum. I was searching for employment rights for PTSD. I'm afraid it could make the situation worse if I tell them about the results of my testing. They knew I was being tested b/c they said I needed an official diagnosis. When it turned out it wasn't ADHD but PTSD, I had a major meltdown and am left wondering how to approach them with this news. Things have gotten much better at work, so I don't want open a can of worms and draw attention to myself. However, they are making judgements about me anyway, so at least this may provide them with a "reason" for my erratic behavior. My therapist says this is my decision to make. But wondering what others think... Thanks for listening.

 

[PTSD and Me]

Hi Kesava,

Welcome to the group and thanks for posting on my thread. It's funny that you thought you had ADHD. I have PTSD and my husband has ADHD, but he wasn't diagnosed until after we met. Once you talk with someone about how it feels to have ADHD, it starts to seem different. But clinical folks confuse the diagnoses a lot. I was first diagnosed with bipolar disorder before they got it right and determined PTSD.

It absolutely is your decision whether to disclose or not. I can give you my thoughts as both a woman with PTSD and a Human Resources professional. First, because of my unique situation, I always disclose my PTSD to my new employers (usually after I have accepted an offer and usually after I pass my initial probationary period - but more on this in a minute). PTSD is generally considered a disability and I am considered an individual with a disability because of it. That triggers all kinds of protections and things that wouldn't otherwise be there. For example, I provide the doctor's affirmation that I have a disability, PTSD, and I usually ask for accommodations including a private workspace, ability to attend doctor's appointments as needed, and flexibility to work from home as needed (the kind of work I do allows this, but not all kinds do - customer-facing roles for example). I am very comfortable being assertive about my rights and insisting that I be treated accordingly. I'm also willing to explain any part of my PTSD (possible exception of the details of how I got it) if people are interested. That probably comes with my role and my personality of wanting to be authentic in the workplace and my PTSD being part of that. I'm not ashamed of my PTSD and though it took a little while longer, I am also not ashamed to say I have a disability.

There are some brand new laws that went into effect in the end of March applying to employers who are federal contractors with Affirmative Action obligations that now require employers to ask if a person considers themselves a person with a disability at the application phase and during regular surveying. I check yes on these questions because some employers need to boost their numbers of people with disabilities (all, actually, if you look at the unemployment statistics for people with disabilities compared to people without) and it can be used as an advantage if the job is actually with the federal government.

That said, I would only disclose it to HR people who should know it is a disability and engage in a dialogue with you about what you need, you can decide then if you want your direct supervisor to know or not. It can be a tough decision to make, but mostly it's about being comfortable with yourself. I know your diagnosis is relatively new, but seeing as how you have already had some work issues, I would lean towards giving the letter because you will be protected under the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) of 1990, ADA Amendments Act of 2008, and possibly (if your employer is a federal contractor) under Section 503 of The Rehabilitation Act of 1973.

Are there any other questions I can answer for you? I'm not an attorney and you are right to think about this thoroughly before you take action, but I'm happy to help someone else down this road if I can. It makes my journey more meaningful when I can offer experience and advice to someone else.

 

[Changing4Best]

My first though or answer was "a nightmare" but really, I have not been able to hold jobs for more than a few months other than helping out in the family businesses.

 

[Sharon PTSD worrier]

I'm currently having lots of difficulties with my employers. I have had PTSD for seven years but for five of those the symptoms were rarely shown as I became very good at avoiding triggers. Then one of my supervisors started making jokey 'lads' comments and was generally very discriminatory against women. I found myself starting to get flashbacks whenever he was around and I ended up going home sick. After three days my general manager asked when I thought i'd be ready to go back to work and I agreed to go straight away if the shifts were dealt with so that I would never have to work with that supervisor. Work refused to let me return for a month and now my hours have been cut down so much I am going to have to start looking for another job because for the last three months I have not been able to pay the bills. I have talked to HR who seem to try to push on me that my behavior is hurting my supervisors pride (they know now I am receiving treatments for PTSD), I had to see occupational health who told me the disability laws wouldn't apply to me because I did not tell them before I got the job (I hadn't been diagnosed) and that they'd had trouble with me from the start (also not true i've received nothing but praise) and that I was best off just quitting because it obviously wasn't the job for me.

 

[PTSD and Me]

What country are you in? In the U.S. you can ask for an accommodation for a disability at any time during your employment.

 

[Sharon (again)]

I'm in the U.K. rules are strict here to but the occupational therapist has been leading me astray a bit and telling me things I now know to be the case. I've been given an advocate to stand in for me which is really good because the stress at work is getting in the way of my treatment and I really want them to stop pressurizing me to give them a date when I'll be 'cured'.

 

[knap-sack]

I have an awful time at work. I have anxiety the day before I go to work getting things ready for work. I dont like having to deal with people.

I have had ptsd since 1982 I have learned to endure tolerate and isolate and sometimes run the other direction when I can't deal someone who I can't tolerate at that time.

I have anxiety just driving to work. I feel the stress is going to shorten my life. I feel I will never be able to enjoy retirement. Work is sucking the life out of me.

I recently got a new job and I did disclose I am a disabled veteran but I did not disclose the ailment. I work in a high stress environment dealing with large transport aircraft. I believe if I disclosed I have ptsd that would be the end of my career. I disclosed that I was a disabled veteran because we do government contract work.

I am always on edge at work. I work great on my own but I dont like interaction. I dont want share anything about myself at work. My past experience has shown me that when folks find a blemish in your armour that go for when its advantageous for them and at my weakest moment and for someone with ptsd that can be very detrimental even career ending.

The real world and what we would like to be are two separate worlds and its like night and day the difference.

I have endured the work place because I have had to. My survival depended upon it.

I feel ok at home most days that I don't have to work. But work means conflicts and having to get my point across and it can so difficult when I know I can loose control emotionally. I feel Bruce Baner the Hulk sometimes. I have learned to control myself. Sometimes I want to walk up the work place bully and show him the dark side.

I don't and probably never will, I hold it inside and the stress feels like it builds up like nuclear reactor having a meltdown before it blows.

I know this was started a couple years back but it does help to let it out.

Before the trauma I trusted coworkers and enjoyed their company. Today I just want do my job and go home with no conflicts. Without conflicts you wouldn't need H R which I also avoid.

Also today my fear would be that I couldn't pass a return to work evaluation. Maybe I shouldn't be working.