I actually think that you having zero skills training could be a big positive as it could help you a lot to have skills before you try again. In other words it should is something that should make this easier for you. Oh and I am certainly not going to push going back so don't worry! ;) You have other priorities and you need to settle.
What I wondered is if you possibly went in putting a lot of pressure on yourself to care or attach as well. That can be a subtle and not visible backdrop to what we are doing but I know I have done that in a way and I think for me it intensified the process. I was pressurising myself because I had the theory in mind and was planning to "fix" things rather than letting that side of treatment happen on its own - automatically.
Just something to think of and consider. I know for me most of the pressure I experience usually comes from me. learning to slow down and pace myself and realise when something is just starting to injure me is hard as I have so little connection to myself and tend to think my way through situations. My idea of "enough" is crisis point and is not the first warning signs.
I am so much better with this and really have improved mostly as a result of lessons learned from therapy fallout. But regardless it is still a challenge for me.
I also think in a subject like relating there can be many tiny vulnerable spots that make up that difficulty and that finding out what those are is much more useful in practice than knowing we have attachment or relationship issues. I shall try to think of an example! :cautious:
Have you ever looked at the DBT self help site?
What I wondered is if you possibly went in putting a lot of pressure on yourself to care or attach as well. That can be a subtle and not visible backdrop to what we are doing but I know I have done that in a way and I think for me it intensified the process. I was pressurising myself because I had the theory in mind and was planning to "fix" things rather than letting that side of treatment happen on its own - automatically.
Just something to think of and consider. I know for me most of the pressure I experience usually comes from me. learning to slow down and pace myself and realise when something is just starting to injure me is hard as I have so little connection to myself and tend to think my way through situations. My idea of "enough" is crisis point and is not the first warning signs.
I am so much better with this and really have improved mostly as a result of lessons learned from therapy fallout. But regardless it is still a challenge for me.
I also think in a subject like relating there can be many tiny vulnerable spots that make up that difficulty and that finding out what those are is much more useful in practice than knowing we have attachment or relationship issues. I shall try to think of an example! :cautious:
Have you ever looked at the DBT self help site?
