Well I am still on holidays( if you can call it that). That is one of the problems, 'The Beast' doesn't know that, it digs its claws in no matter where you are or what your doing. The medication doesn't keep it totally in check, it takes a shit load of willpower too, and when your mind is tired, that's all it needs to get a claw in.
I think your right Sarg. I am an avid campaigner of getting off the drugs and alcohol and going to therapy, but in the long run, if it's not affecting your family, why the hell not.
Someone told me the other day that I am always so negative at times, and I got to thinking. Am I the only one like that? Then I come on here and I realise I am not.
Why are we? Well the majority of us have lost an aweful lot to the beast, or it has at least taken some sort of toll in our lives. Add to that the massive amount of symptoms associated with the beast and the side effects associated to the medication we have been given. Things like Anger (what this thread is about), depression, insomnia, irritable bowel, bruxism,hypervigilence, anxiety, weight gain, restless leg, hyperhydrosis, agitation, dry skin, rashes, just to name a few. If I was to start a list and get the members to add to it, with a symptom per line, it would be a couple of pages long. I might just do that.
Getting back on track. So we have lost a lot, experience these symptoms which often restrict us from socialising sometimes, or else we have to medicate to socialise. If we don't we are usually walking around with our mood meter balancing on the edge of a knife. If we do travel, we need a separate bag for our medication.
Well I hate being like this, but a normal person experiencing any of our symptoms would be negative and depressed, so no wonder why we are.
I try so hard, but because I try so hard, the family get used to it and when I fall down the hole they are affected too and often forget that that is normal. Hope you understand.
I will shut up now.
