What Makes You Angry Today?

[holdenmonty]

I don't know what the f*ck I have done to make my supervisor hate me... So my therapist has told me to take at least one wellness walk where I just spend some time away from my desk and work for a little bit each day. So I know most of you guys aren't fans of the wounded warrior project (wwp) but I am in one of their trial programs called wwp talk where a person calls me once a week and just asks me how I'm doing and we talk about anything and everything but they aren't a therapist. Kind of like how this is. But anyway I have them call me every Thursday at 0930 when I normally take my wellness walk so I just talk to them for my wellness walk. But I have a refill prescription that I need to pick up, and really need to get a haircut so since today isn't busy I asked my supervisor if after my wellness walk if I could go to the pharmacy and pick up my refill and get my haircut. She asked me why I don't just do both of those during my lunch time and I told her I figured it would be easier since I would be at my car and during lunch both the pharmacy and barbershop is always a lot busier then in the mornings and she said I still don't get it so whatever.

But what the hell is that suppose to me. We are active duty military. I you are my supervisor and I am below you in our chain of command. You are an e-6 I am an e-5 you should know by now to tell me yes or no. not so whatever, so whatever is completely up to interpretation because she didn't tell me know I'm going to do what I want since she didn't tell me no. I know when my wife says whatever it usually means that I better not do what I'm about to do or she will be pissed at me but that is my wife and my supervisor isn't even close to my wife and it matters how my wife says it as well. I understand that my wife has a secret language that I'm slowly learning but my supervisor even though she is a woman shouldn't be using her secret language in the work place. I want to tell her to stop using her secret language because it is completely up to interpretation and just because I think she means one thing doesn't mean that it is what she meant which isn't good in the work place. My supervisor knows that I'm a very black and white person with very little gray and that when she talks in the gray I don't understand. I have to deal with learning the gray when I'm at home with my wife and kids.

Maybe it's me being irrational but it seems to me that a yes should be yes and a no should be no not so whatever... I guess I'm just getting frustrated with her supervisory style which seems to be treating me like I'm one of her kids which pisses me off as well because I'm not one of her kids I am a grown ass adult with two kids of my own. I shouldn't be treated like I'm a f*cking child.

 

[holdenmonty]

So I managed to explain to her how she confused me with her so whatever comment in a professional way and she told me to ask our leadership which seemed like she doesn't have any confidence in herself to make any decisions but I asked our leadership and they said to go for it. So that is one frustration dealt with. Victory for me.

 

[LIllabeth]

@Lurch I have not been to a movie in over two years because theatres are too dang loud, I cannot control who sits behind, in front or next to me, people crowding into my personal space bubble....

My time in uniform is starting to come to an end but am uneasy about what if any type of employment I can do (even the docs are unsure at this point)

I would love to go back to school, to the movies, get a civi job doing something I enjoy but I can barely get out of my house.....and it makes me angry that I used to be a different person - someone who loved going to the movies, loved new adventures and challenges, and now I am not. I agree with Grizzly - sometimes I think it is fear but it is the stressors (noise, idgets, travel to and from, etc) that is really the problem

 

[Lurch]

@LIllabeth and Grizzly, I know it is not fear. That is what pissed me off so bad yesterday. The only apprehension I have going to these places is the way that I feel after. My wife thinks I am afraid so I leave a place. Its not that, I feel myself get stressed, hypervigilent and angry so I leave to find a better place and a better me.

 

[Grizzly]

That's what angers me too @Lurch. Civilians even though they may understand the dynamics of PTSD from a textbook perspective. They seem to have trouble understanding our deep levels of stress and anxiety.

My wife enjoys social functions. Like all of y'all can imagine what I think about them. She thinks I'm just an anti-social person. However, as much as I'd love to involve myself. Be happy. Have fun. Laugh. I simply cannot. I hate myself for it.

I could go on and on with little things. She understands the nightmares. Waking up screaming, etc. Cause that's how they show PTSD on TV.

 

[LIllabeth]

@Lurch, I was trying to let you know you were not the only one that these things bother....

 

[Friday]

Roflmao... Ooooh....@Holden "The Secret Language of Wives" should be a book!!!

With pictures. Like the Decision Flow Chart with "You Poor Bastard" dead center. It is the single, sole, solitary reason why I don't date women. Not that it's completely fail safe: Can't even begin to tell you how many times I ended up shouting at my ex to stop interpreting what I'm saying! I say what I mean, and mean what I say ... Not some kind of yes means no, 6 steps to the left and do a rain dance to ascertain the answer for Tuesday, but 4 right and pray, for Wednesday. :confused::eek: Only piece I'm fluent in is that if a girlfriend says "Fine" I'm f*cked. Like, seriously, f*cked. (Fine. Ha!... I don't think that word means what you think it means.)

 

[RTO]

Try this: When out in public have someone you 'trust' like your husband/wife/kid/ gently keep their hand placed on your back or shoulder as much as possible. Like the concept of a comfort dog.

 

[Friday]

I don't understand people who want to be "helpful" by messing with my stuff. It's mine. Either don't effing touch it, or ask. And when I say no, I really, really, really do not mean yes. I promise. When I say no, I actually mean no. No also does not I mean do it when I'm not there, because then I'll be all grateful you just spent hours doing something I asked you not to do. Head. Meet drywall. Repeat.

 

[holdenmonty]

I feel the same way with my stuff. Especially at work. I have my own desk and every now and then when I'm not there somebody sits at my desk to use my computer which I don't mind but when they move my stuff really pisses me off. I have hotwheels monster truck, and a hotwheels car and a paper airplane on my desk to remind me to not take things to seriously and to have fun and they moved them into my desk drawer... I was so furious when they weren't there I was like who the f*ck touched my shit. If you sit at my desk don't touch my shit I don't give a f*ck who you are don't touch my shit.

 

[combatgoldfish]

Not sure wtf is wrong with people but everyone is coming out of the woodwork about The American Sniper movie. A lot of disrespectful comments and ignorant statements from people who've never served a day in uniform, people who never read American Sniper or watched the movie.

I didn't see anyone doing this when Lone Survior came out or Black Hawk Down.

 

[Raven]

Seth Rogen said some shit, and everyone's in a tizzy. Besides maybe a handful of teenagers, who actually thinks Seth Rogen's opinions matter?