Like this memory's so awful, your brain blocked it out of your conscious mind until now. But now that you've remembered it, you're afraid to lose it again. Is it natural for one to try to relive the memory in question so as to not forget? Especially for me, losing memories is scary. I remember things that I can't believe happened. And sometimes, I can't even remember recent happenings in my life. And when I do remember these recent events, I start to feel teary-eyed. I'm afraid of forgetting things. When I recall bad memories, I try to reify them in my mind so that I don't forget them. But sometimes, I keep reliving that memory and cannot keep track of the present. The present is very precious to me, but whenever I remember bad things, the importance no longer presents itself to me. Am I at a crossroads where I have to choose between living in the past, and living in the present?