Normally, it would be depression which would just ogle and frustrate me because I am a fairly positive person, otherwise I would not be able to keep chugging. Negative thinking doesn't cause me somatic symptoms, those happen regardless due to the differences between PTSD and depression. That diagnosis was also used to invalidate me frequently, and people such as my family and high school nurse would chalk any criticism of another person I had or any ailment I had down to "my mood." Especially when they found out I wasn't in therapy and refused all medication from the start.
But after I realized I was transgender, all I had to do was say the word before the doctors would scroll down "borderline personality." For some reason, saying "I'm transgender" wasn't enough for doctors to even begin considering that perhaps I had Gender Dysphoria (which at the time was called Gender Identity Disorder). I would flat-out tell them I was transgender and they would ignore it :confused:. You can bring a horse to water...
No one wanted to believe a 14 year old could know they were transgender. They thought I was just having migrating identity crises to whatever I had read about last night on the internet that I thought was "cool." Which totally isn't what borderline personality disorder is at all, but that's what everyone told me it was that in therapy sessions when trying to explain it to me.
I had a plethora of really terrible doctors! They did me a lot of harm, and lots of other people I'm sure, too. I adamantly rejected having any sort of mental illness because of them and the ableist treatment I got.
After I transitioned for about a year, I made another transgender friend who I related heavily to, and we had similar bizarre reactions to everyday things because of childhood sexual abuse. That friend pointed me in the direction of PTSD. Before I could begin to separate my PTSD from the normal hassles of being transgender, I had to first get over the hurdles of finding transgender care, then transitioning a little to a more comfortable place. Luckily my current therapist (who is also transgender, thank the lord) by chance specializes in healing from sexual abuse, so I am ridiculously fortunate.
But after I realized I was transgender, all I had to do was say the word before the doctors would scroll down "borderline personality." For some reason, saying "I'm transgender" wasn't enough for doctors to even begin considering that perhaps I had Gender Dysphoria (which at the time was called Gender Identity Disorder). I would flat-out tell them I was transgender and they would ignore it :confused:. You can bring a horse to water...
No one wanted to believe a 14 year old could know they were transgender. They thought I was just having migrating identity crises to whatever I had read about last night on the internet that I thought was "cool." Which totally isn't what borderline personality disorder is at all, but that's what everyone told me it was that in therapy sessions when trying to explain it to me.
I had a plethora of really terrible doctors! They did me a lot of harm, and lots of other people I'm sure, too. I adamantly rejected having any sort of mental illness because of them and the ableist treatment I got.
After I transitioned for about a year, I made another transgender friend who I related heavily to, and we had similar bizarre reactions to everyday things because of childhood sexual abuse. That friend pointed me in the direction of PTSD. Before I could begin to separate my PTSD from the normal hassles of being transgender, I had to first get over the hurdles of finding transgender care, then transitioning a little to a more comfortable place. Luckily my current therapist (who is also transgender, thank the lord) by chance specializes in healing from sexual abuse, so I am ridiculously fortunate.
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