Thank you
Forgive me but I'm a little confused. Have you been evaluated and diagnosed with PTSD but you've been self-diagnosing these other disorders? Or is the PTSD also self-diagnosed?
If the PTSD is also self-diagnosed then, like SunnyBrook said, you really need to get a proper evaluation. If, however, you have been evaluated for and diagnosed with PTSD but you're not finding any relief from that you may need to change things up a bit. No self-medicating. Take only what your doctor prescribes, the way they prescribe it (or decide to make your journey without medication, but no self-medicating). Find a therapist to help you work through your trauma and teach you coping strategies. Hang out here for a while; you'll find great support and information.
BTW, welcome to the forum. :hello:
The initial diagnosis of post traumatic stress was almost 10 years ago. In 2001, I was urged to go to a psychiatrist by the school I was attending for some strange behavior. I'm not sure who reported me, but the school obviously knew I was having problems.
The psychiatrist diagnosed me as PTSD, which I had no idea what it was, nor did I actually care. What confused me at that time was that I had never considered myself a victim of trauma.
We had gone through sessions of EFT where my eyes would follow his hand and we would go over memories I never knew existed. I remember weeping multiple times in his couch... however, he never put me on medication (I wouldn't have taken it even if he told me to). I had explained to him I smoked weed, though I down-played how much I smoked. However, it was the pot smoking which I believe assisted with the EFT and the healing.
When I moved, I no longer had pot and was much more emotionally unstable than before. No energy, very irritable and angry. Problems with focusing.
I self diagnosed myself so many times because after the initial diagnosis of PTSD, I would go to doctors and say I had ADHD or anxiety to get medication so that I could function as a normal person. PTSD wasn't a reality for me at that point. If I had gone through a war or had been raped perhaps I would have believed it to be a real disability, however, all I knew was I needed something external for me to function properly.
Around 2 years ago, I went through a complete breakdown. It was swift and devastating and left me shaking and exhausted. Muscle twitches, racing thoughts, insomnia put me in a state of desperation. 4 doctors I went to. Two Western stress clinics, an Asian medicine doctor, and a psychotherapist. Oh, and a life-coach who was an absolute scam artist. I was diagnosed as minor-depression, stress-disorder, and anxiety. I tried 3 or 4 different SSRI's, prozac, zoloft and 2 others I can't remember. There was no affect on any of these, however the benzos helped considerably in thinking and helping me get out of bed.
PTSD was never a diagnosis, and in the culture I live in, with the achievements and experiences I had gone through, no one ever believed that this to be something that could be serious or long term.
Well, here I am. Back to square one. It hasn't been until I quit my job because the medication or disability made it too hard for me function where I've had time to really think about what I was going through as something real. Having time to analyze myself, my actions, my life, it's only now I realize I have to confront my problem as if it was a real disease and not just a character defect. Because character defects don't require 4 pills to function in a social or professional setting.
So... I'm looking for a cure. I'm researching as much as I can to find the quickest way for me to adjust and become normal without the use of medication.
