Will he come back?

[sniperwifey]

My husband is a combat vet.

We battled 6 years with combat PTSD and childhood trauma.

He would always threaten divorce. And this one was final.

I am raising our daughter by myself, in a separate state. He is alone.

Any chance he will come back?

He wanted a divorce for 100 reasons, all of which hold no logic. And, he would threaten divorce every other month, and turn around, and pretend he didn't and everything was OK.

This last threat, I decided to remove myself, because he was becoming hostile. He just kept pushing me away, and then the pull back in crap.

 

[The Albatross]

Do you want him back? Reread your post and if so, why?

 

[sniperwifey]

I would for sure, if he can commit to treatment. And because we have a daughter together.

 

[sniperwifey]

You're right though. Sometimes I get lost in what COULD be and I have to remind myself that its gone, I do struggle accepting it. I hate that its not in my control. Thanks, I needed that reminder.

 

[cdnjuryhelp]

PTSD can include feelings of extreme guilt, shame, and isolation, on top of a host of other emotions and symptoms connected to the illness. I'm no expert. You have my sympathies - those were my experiences when I was ill.

 

[America15]

When you read my posts you'll see we are going through a similar situation (we don't have kids though). To say yes he will come back or not he won't would be way to easy for a person in his situation. My husband is gone for 7 weeks now and I feel like he tries to figure out who he is and what he really wants. He is still in contact with me (even though he could easily just walk away and just separate or divorce like he told me) and he's reaching out to me. Moreover, he still takes care of me financially and he responds to I love you messages. Is there any guarantee that he will come back? No.
It is very difficult to judge about an individual because the pattern looks like the same- physically and mentally separation, deep thoughts about the purpose of being with the loved one or not, confusing messages. Nothing adds up because they don't know what is right or wrong.
Is he still communicating with you besides in regards of your daughter?
My personal experience is to give him the time he needs even though this feeling drives me insane. But also set boundaries. It's a very difficult mixture of being supportive, setting boundaries and still show feelings. He needs time to figure out what he wants unfortunately that is not up to you if he will come back or not. My advice to pressure him, don't overwhelm him (to many feelings or even bag that he has to come back) but also offer your help.
I feel your pain but also his. It's a huge struggle as a family to go through this time together and not together at the same time.
Stay strong for your family, think positive and take day by day.

Sorry I meant NOT to pressure him (especially with therapy-when he is ready he is ready. Pressure will not make him go to therapy. The more pressure the more they run and push you away).