Within

[digger]

I didn't open up as I should of

My counsellor always gets me to question 'should' statements.

But it was the first,

Precisely. It was the first session. Why 'should' you have opened up more? Don't you think most people would need a little time to get to know their therapist and build up some trust before laying it all out there. I've been seeing my counsellor for over a year and there are still some sessions where I barely say two words to her (literally!). Sometimes, just getting myself there and staying there is enough. You went - that's a HUGE step in itself. Try not to minimise your achievements. xx

 

[Miss_Understood]

I can't open up my floodgates
Because the feeling just negates
It burns like hell fire
Place the thorns upon this liar

 

[Miss_Understood]

Therapy yesterday, solo session. I opened up a lot. I really liked my therapist. I know it's gonna be a long road with tears, sadness, anger, pain and healing, it'll be tough but I'll come through it, I have to.

I have a week worth of homework. Yesterday I had to talk to people and tell them that I'm sorry for disassociating.

Today I have to tell myself 5 things I like about myself.
1: I like my self awareness.
2: I like that I can find humor in just about everything
3: I like that I'm loyal to the ones I love
4: I like my eyes
5: I like that I'm physically strong.

 

[Miss_Understood]

Many many seizures this week, which triggers me which sets off my seizures. So I'm kind of in a catch 22 situation here. Missed couples therapy because of seizures. I feel like I'm losing my mind, I feel so alone yet everyone I care about is around me. As if I didn't have enough to deal with ptsd let's throw in epilepsy too.
Rough waters ahead.