Working with younger parts & success stories

KayW

Confident
I've done some parts work in therapy when my therapist will invite a different part into the session. Sometimes my therapist will speak with that part, other times they've tried to help me speak between those parts (not very successfully). I don't have DID so I do have some awareness of the fragmented parts but I find it is really difficult (and frightening) to work with them.

I just wanted to hear about other people's experiences working with parts. What kind of ways does your therapist use? Is there anything others have found successful?

would love to hear of any success stories of integrating parts too
 
i don't suffer DID, but i've worked with the inner child theories enough that i still comfort mini-me as often as she needs for as long as she needs.

begging forgiveness if i vioted the contemporary diagnosis boundaries. i still haven't quite mastered the new normal.
i wasn't able to master the old normals, either, but still trying.
 
We’ve worked a lot with my “parts.” I also do not have DID. However, dissociation in my daily life or in therapy has been my norm for coping, which is what we are trying to get away from. Early in my therapy, my T would talk to me of how we could imagine somewhere that my younger parts would feel safe. We would create these places and put them there so that we could look in on how they were doing. We work a lot on feeling compassion towards all of my parts, even the mean ones. Many times my T would model this. She would help me realize why they are there and remind me that they no longer need to do their jobs to keep me safe.

I am a really imaginative person, so it wasn’t hard to witness this world that my brain created to cope with trauma. However, my T often reminds me that I am a whole person and an adult. It’s easy for me to get swept away and my t refuses to let that happen. I think this is why she won’t talk directly to a “part.” That would be too confirming to my mind that I’m still the nine, six, or three year old kid that I feel like I am when we work on certain things.
 
Doing playful things and discovering your desires are ways to get in touch with your younger parts. And then sharing with T how you felt when you did those things
That sounds like a gentle way in.
i still comfort mini-me as often as she needs for as long as she needs.
I think this is what I need to do... I have a tendency to tell her to go away because I'm ashamed of her, and I know she needs comfort.

Some of my issue with my parts is my desire to be normal... But my idea of normal is someone that has never experienced trauma, my denial of parts largely comes from that. Like if I deny those traumatized parts, trauma won't have happened. I am much further on towards acceptance, but still work to do.


dissociation in my daily life or in therapy has been my norm for coping
Yes, dissociation is a big part of my life. I worry that I couldn't function without it.
We would create these places and put them there so that we could look in on how they were doing.
That's an interesting way of doing in, looking in at them. I think I would n be interested in doing that.
 
I have a tendency to tell her to go away because I'm ashamed of her, and I know she needs comfort.
me, too. kinda like the people who sold me into prostitution. "yes, daddy, i want to be a good girl." learning how to love myself as a child is even tougher for me than it was for the people who let it be okay that a child was crying in a dark closet, still wearing a bloody skirt. it seems unlikely that mini-me asked for that bloody skirt, but big me could abuse the tearful mini-me with equal enthusiasm.
Some of my issue with my parts is my desire to be normal.
another ditto. i have since come to believe that "normal" works better as a setting on a washing machine. i've liked myself better since i quit throwing mini-me in the washer set on the normal cycle. i've even managed to coax her out of that closet and change her skirt. i didn't bother throwing that skirt into the washer i'm pretty sure the normal setting wouldn't have washed out the stains. not to long ago, i even heard her laugh like a child. oh, happy day. . . you don't need to be like the other kids, mini-me. i'm learning how to love you, just the way you are. prayers ongoing. . .

time has no meaning in the healing process. ~Algonquin proverb
 
In our early work:
The safe places where some of my parts live: my grandmother’s farm. The joy of that place is endless and full of places to explore. Another place is a room that has crayons and coloring books. Nice adults that stay with those parts. One place that my therapist suggested was a soft room that my part could go into to scream and throw things. That was a very helpful place for one of my parts.

Currently, the parts are all pretty much hanging out with me. I am the one that takes care of them. Some have found rest and don’t really need to hang around anymore. It’s kind of nice to know that they are at peace.
 
have since come to believe that "normal" works better as a setting on a washing machine. i've liked myself better since i quit throwing mini-me in the washer set on the normal cycle. i've even managed to coax her out of that closet and change her skirt. i didn't bother throwing that skirt into the washer i'm pretty sure the normal setting wouldn't have washed out the stains.
Thank you for sharing your story with me. This is an amazing analogy because I guess that's what I'm trying to do...to wash her clean and normal.
I am the one that takes care of them. Some have found rest and don’t really need to hang around anymore. It’s kind of nice to know that they are at peace.
I think I need to get to a place where I can acknowledge the child part kindly but not react to her feelings.
 
This is an amazing analogy because I guess that's what I'm trying to do
this compliment might be the highest honor i have received on my trail of tears. i get lost in metaphor so easily that i have received in my journey to understand that i sound like a babbling fool in the attempt to advocate for mini-me.

of course fact is stranger than fiction. fiction is obliged to make sense. ~mark twain

i might build a trophy case to remind me of this literal honor. the honors i have received to date have gone to the landfill. they don't help me feel honorable.
 
Some of my issue with my parts is my desire to be normal... But my idea of normal is someone that has never experienced trauma, my denial of parts largely comes from that. Like if I deny those traumatized parts, trauma won't have happened. I am much further on towards acceptance, but still work to do.

I think a way to look at this is even “normal/non-traumatized” people have parts too. They wouldn’t even necessarily look all that different because most people have insecurities, fears, small t traumas that have affected them and how their own brains work.

I don’t have DID either and have done some basic parts work. It actually really helped me in developing separation between overwhelming emotion and the logic behind it. It helped me be able to see that oh that person/part is reacting emotionally to xyz and here’s me, the logical driver able to respond to that without letting that emotion flood me.
 
speak that language, it works for me ☺️
ditto kay. delayed early development allowed me to be a bit more aware of the language i believe all humans speak at birth.
i am no longer called, "retard," but i still think retards have the speak more clearly than "more developed" languages.

WAAAAAAAAAHHHHH
 
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