Relationship Worried Girlfriend Trying Not To Make Things Worse

[Civogliobene]

Worried Gf Trying Not To Make Things Worse

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Any response will be greatly appreciated.

...He's hilarious, active, protective, and takes care of everyone close to him. At first everything was fun and new but as time has passed he has become increasingly irritable, he lashes out at the smallest provocation, he hates being touched, he shares none of his thoughts unless they're angry, and I woke up to him screaming in his sleep the other night. I don't want to diagnose him myself, but this seemed like a good place to go for advice.

 

[Sweetpea76]

I'd give him a little time. It takes awhile to adjust after deployments.

 

[Justmehere]

It is wise that you are not trying to diagnose him. He could be going through a normal adjustment, and there could also be more going on. But you do know how his lashing out is impacting you and it's ok to set healthy boundaries around what you need.

A couple of hypothetical examples:
It would be ok to let him know you need to talk about other things in addition to what he is angry about.
It would be ok to let him know, in a clear but gentle and non-judgmental way, that you can't talk to him when he is yelling (or does whatever he does when he lashes out), but can talk about the matter later (when he is calmer).