You're A Stranger And You Make Me & My Kids Uncomfortable

[Heather]

That is what my sister said to me. I haven't seen her in 3 years (her husband sexually assaulted me and she doesn't believe it).

I was in Target and I saw her...I plead temporary insanity.

She looked right at me but wouldn't say a word. I immediately became enraged.

I said really loud, "you're a stranger and you make me and my kid uncomfortable!"

Then I walked away.

 

[EveHarrington]

:hug:

You're better off without her if she is going to take the side of a sexual abuser!

 

[shimmerz]

I had a friend who has been really kind to me along the way. The problem is that her husband is a freaking pig. And she is okay with it. And when I seriously called him out on it when he went WAY over the edge one evening, there seemed to be a new dynamic take place. SHE (my friend) was angry at me.

I haven't learned a ton of relationship skills since this PTSD thing struck again. But this i do know. This was one f*cked up couple. And I don't do f*cked up anymore.

 

[Gs172003]

Some people are afraid of bad people. Like the wife of a sexual predator.

My sister when she was 15 was being pursued by a 40 year old man . he was our uncle by marriage. Every time she would tell my mom my mom would just tell her to stay away from him. Thing is the same man was doing the same stuff to her.

My brother stopped this guy from assaulting my sister. My mom was more worried about breaking up their family. She told my sister to keep quiet. One day sister didn't keep quiet.

Down the road (waaaaay down) it occurred to me. Mom had been raped when she was 16 and this was bringing all this back up. She was scared of that man.

Is that the case with sister? I dunno. Just something to think about. It may not be she doesn't believe you. It may be she's scared to speak up.

 

[Heather]

Than you all for your replies.

We both were sexually abused as kids by my dad. Although my sister denies it and has never talked about it.

My therapist said she can't believe me because it threatens her marriage...I get that but I AM NOT LYING!

My sister said all I do is lie and all I've ever done is lie..... NOT about this. Theres just nothing worse than being called a liar.... when all I did was tell the truth and I've been and so has my daughter punished ever since. it makes me nuts.

I've been working hard in therapy about not being so reactive....I think I need more work. Just when I saw her it all came flooding back and immediately saw red and acted like a lunatic.

 

[shimmerz]

Theres just nothing worse than being called a liar...

Sure there is. It's called being in denial. AKA living a lie.

I am thrilled for you, sad for your sister.

 

[Gs172003]

Than you all for your replies.

We both were sexually abused as kids by my dad. Although my sister deni...

One thing I've noticed about my mom..she always sides with the man. I think, again, it's because she's afraid. Doesn't make it right it just is. Could be your sister.

Keep working on you. Hopefully she'll come later.

 

[Heather]

@shimmerz thank you for putting it in those terms.... it gives me a new perspective on how to look at this situation.

You are right my sister is a sad human being. cuz I wouldn't want to be married to that.

 

[Heather]

I think that's a sweet sentiment @missy meier but I don't see her coming around anytime.....not ever

 

[Gs172003]

I think that's a sweet sentiment @missy meier but I don't see her coming around anyti...

I'm sorry to hear that.