The Third Thought -thought Interuption

[7Cs]

Structural dissociation.

So we're taught in therapy to stop negative thoughts and to use positive self talk to counter the negative... to put it all in perspective.

So that's two "voices" or thought processes and those are supposed to be normal especially in therapy. Although I kind of see intrusive thoughts like negative self talk to be abnormal and probably coming from a "part" or fragment.

So in this scenario the negative self talk begins and is pouty and depressed saying how you not goos enough in whatever situation is bothering you. Then because of all you've learned in therapy you come in and start self soothing and refuting the negative with positive, etc. Now here's the weird part... all of the sudden while this inner dialog is going on it is interrupted by a third angry thought voice that tells both the negative self talk and the soothing positive self talk to "just shut up". This makes everything come to a halt.

To me this seems to play into the theory of structural dissociation.

Or is that kind of normal?
T said she's never heard of that so it leads me to think it's not.

While my T believes in parts and that you can have multiple inner children, she doesn't like to "put things in a box" as far as structural dissociation goes. She prefers to stick the inner child in your pocket to keep it safe when it comes out inappropriately. And comfort it or them randomly. She also talks about asking yourself "what do you need right now" which I think is like talking to the inner child.

I wonder if her idea of inner children is similar to my understanding of parts.

I told her today that regardless of what they're called I think that each one has its own issues that need to be worked through.

 

[shimmerz]

I see those 'mean' voices as the voices of those that abused us. I don't see them as an inner child. That's just my take on things. Doesn't mean it is right.

I spent probably 4 months continually repeating to myself the Ho'oponopono saying to try to rewire my brain to stop them. It worked. I now have replaced it with a more soothing mantra. It has helped tons with my self care routine.

Just a thought.....

 

[pixel]

Does the angry voice say anything else?
Can you reply to it?

You ask if this is normal. Let's look forward to the more knowledgeable members responding. ( I have a part that does this, but I can't call it a 'third thought', it's a unique, individual part. )

I told her today that regardless of what they're called I think that each one has its own issues that need to be worked through.

Well done! :)
It's great that you said that, I hope T will listen and help you work through this.

 

[7Cs]

Does the angry voice say anything else?
Can you reply to it?

You ask if this is normal. Let's look forw...

It doesn't say anything else... mostly because when that happens it works. Authority. Like when kids are arguing and you yell "be quiet" and they all look at you surprised and immediately quiet down.

I've only really noticed it in this kind of context of negative thought and self soothing, but not every time.

I do think of it as part or fragment like.

It's all confusing because some behaviors attitudes and thoughts are me but at the same time not in my control, they are not who I know myself to be.

 

[7Cs]

I see those 'mean' voices as the voices of those that abused us. I don't see them as an inner child....

I have a very angry vindictive hateful "inner teen". She's mean. :(

I think the negative self talk is definitely from internalizing our abusers beliefs and how their actions made us feel. I believe that negative self talk is an inner child issue.

As far a the angry shut up... Not an abuser. Something else but not "me"" so to speak.

 

[shimmerz]

When things come to a halt, what happens then? Do you slide into another part do you think? Do things go quiet? Does anything happen with your body? Have you checked what happens with your breathing?

 

[7Cs]

When things come to a halt, what happens then? Do you slide into another part do you think? Do thing...

Things just go quiet. Negative self talk stops along with self soothing (since the negative is gone).
A sensation of catching my breath but I'm not sure if I actually have any physical response.

Definitely no going into another part.

There are times when my personality changes along with my mannerisms and ways of viewing the world but I am always aware and I know in some way it is still "me". This is what I would consider a part - but not so much an "inner child". My T is aware of this but mostly wants me to try grounding techniques when it happens which in my experience is almost impossible unless I can catch it at the right moment.

 

[Sideways]

"The angry shut up". Know it well, and not always one of my parts, sometimes just my brain rallying against the confusion of CBT'ing my negative self-talk with positive self-talk.

I get round it by changing the attempt to introduce "positive" self-talk. CBat is about changing negative and problematic self-talk, but that doesn't mean changing it to "positive stuff" necessarily. It means changing it to stuff that isn't problematic, and oftentimes, your brain is more easily persuaded and less "angry shut up" if you don't try and convince yourself that everything is awesome.

For example, you think that everyone at work hates you and makes fun of you behind your back. So you CBT the f*ck out of thos thoughts. Where's the evidence, what are alternative explanations for how people treat me etc.

But instead of then trying to replace the "everyone hates me" with "everyone thinks I'm totally brilliant and they all really love me" (pfft - brain's gonna rally against that thought for sure), you replace the thought with something more neutral. Like, "Maybe some people don't like me (that's okay, I don't like everybody either), but some people probably like me and a lot of people probably don't have much of an opinion either way..."

Brain has less of a problem with that. When your brain naturally thinks the absolute worst all the time, trying to get it to see the world as rainbows and bunny rabbits? No one believes that. Go for neutral - it's far more believable.