Suddenly Wetting My Pants For No Reason

[Penny C]

There are some other threads that talk about this but they are on the older side. I hope it is okay that I am posting a new thread. a year ago i moved to a different city and started seeing a new therapist. I trusted her more and told her more about my past and I guess opened up some things...

i don't want to say specifics but i peed in my pants when my trauma happened. i remember that very vividly.. this was when i was younger. since then i have not had any peeing accidents. (i am now 28 years old.) but now i am finally facing my trauma and it has become a huge problem. the other day it happened at my work. i was not wearing a pad like i sometimes do. trust me I hate myself for that decision now. I suddenly out of the blue REALLY REALLY REALLY had to go. NOW. it was unbelievable how hard and fast it hit me. I had about ten seconds between first feeling the urge, trying to run to the bathroom and my bladder releasing into my jeans and on the carpet in front of my coworkers. it was the most humiliating moment of my life. somehow worse than the times it has happened on the bus or out in public because at least i won't see the strangers ever again.

Has anyone else experienced this? There is no physical damage to that part of my body. I don't have a history of this. Thereare more details both of this symptom and other symptoms that I find weird and embarrassing and am scared I am the only one. but as this is my first post i'm a bit nervous and would like to leave it at that.... I am so scared this symptoms will never go away. My therapist says they will but the only people I know who have trauma only shared with me about the more "common" side effects for them like flashbacks and panic attacks. So I feel that I am very strange and messed up and my therapist is just trying to make me feel better. I don't want anyone else to have experienced this but if they have I would like to feel less alone. Do you have bladder problems related to trauma? And have you found any relief? Has ANYTHING helped? i feel like the symptom is ruining my entire life and i have been too embarrassed to go back to work...

 

[macbeth]

I'm so sorry that you are experiencing these symptoms. While i can't relate specifically to what you're describing I wanted to thank you for finding the courage to share. :hug:

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Has anyone else experienced this?

Uh huh. Twice. Normally it is REALLY hard to pee. Part physicaly damage (and some mental stuff when i couldnt go i think) and part medication. But i once wet the bed during a nightmare. Woke up in it and my step mom laughed at me cause she never sleeps at night, was up smoking and saw my soaked PJ pants.

And once out public, at a store, when it was crowded. I froze and pissed myself.

I never posted about that last one as it's embarrasing.

Only times it happened to me and both times were due to severe fear. Terror. My therapist agrees that its fear related.

Maybe wear some Depends? Just in case? That is less embarrasing. And they make descrete ones.

Oh and I am 35. My dad and step mom live with me. Both happened this year.

 

[hodge]

I'm so sorry you are having this problem, @Penny C. I would recommend Depends, too. I have another friend who has a similar problem -- it happens whenever she laughs or coughs, etc. I know that's not the same, but you are not alone!

 

[Kailani]

I am so sorry you are going through this!!!! I have had problems holding it all in my whole life and with needing to get there immediately. I end up looking at the bottom shelf in the grocery store and trying to deal until there is a bathroom. Also when talking to a therapist about trauma had that similar problem just not full out peeing. Depends and pads specifically for that might be good. A lot of older women have problems holding their pee when they cough, sneeze... From weakened muscles possibly from childbirth, so there are products like pads out there. Love and support to you!

 

[Sideways]

Definitely the womens pee pads, for no other reason than they're a temporary way to relief the stress of this happening. And a visit to your gp, to check there are no physical causes that you may be unaware of. Female bladder leakage is common, so with a female gp especially, it's really not weird.

And you'ge probly been told this by your T, but peeing during trauma? Really common. Bladder is one of the systems that shit down during the fight/flight response because it's a non-essential when outrunning a lion, so if there's anything in there...yeah.

I haven't reached the point where I've peed in public, but man have I been close. Regular enough that I have an app on my phone to show me the nearest public toilets.

The only reason I haven't is because when I suddenly need to pee, I head for the toilets, but focus completely on my breathing. Deep breathing forces the body out of the fight flight response. And it helps get in control of the bladder again. And (bonus) it can work pretty quick. At times, I will stop the mad dash to the loo for a few moments, because if I can control my breathing, that will work faster than I can get to the ladies.

Once the feeling it might happen hits, the panic escalates super quick. Like many forms of panic attack, it gets fed by the fear of the panic attack - "I'm going to pee my pants, and that's going to be sooo embarrassing, and the sky will fall in, and ..."

Stop that self talk. Like your life depends on it, stop it in its tracks and remind yourself, "I am not escaping a lion, I am breathing..."

And every chance you get, practice your deep breathing exercises. With ptsd, we're usually a lot more stressed than we realise, and it isn't until disaster's about to hit and panic rockets to 100% that this stuff happens. You can get control again. You will get control again. But you need to be able to breathe your way out of that panic:)

 

[Neverthesame]

Is this happening out of nowhere, or in response to something spiking your anxiety?

It's not uncommon at all for someone to void their bladder and or bowel when the fight/flight/freeze response is triggered. **Insert not a psychiatrist caveat** Hence the expressions "being, piss your pants afraid" or "having the shit scared out of you". (If you already know that, sorry. Not trying to be patronising)

Have you been to a doctor about this?
I'm sure you are correct in thinking it's probably psychological and not a physiological issue, but it might be a good idea to rule out a lazy bladder muscle, or nerve issue. (Herniated intervertebral discs can cause issues like this, as one example.) **Insert not a doctor caveat**

Besides the suggestions other people have already given. You may find a change of habits a bit helpful.

• Cut back or cease drinking beverages such as, coffee, tea, soda or energy drinks. Caffeine is a diuretic, it will both increase the production of urine, as well as irritate the bladder.
• Eating a balanced diet with a good amount of fibre can also be helpful. (Sounds weird I know, but gas pressure in the bowel can put additional pressure on the bladder causing a sudden increase in urgency.)
• You might also try going to the washroom at intervals of every couple hours, (Or more or less often, whatever is reasonable for you.) whether you need too or not. This way you'll be less likely to be caught full, should another sudden urgent episode occur.

Anyways. I wanted to point out for sure that it was brave of you to come out with this, to ask about something so embarrassing to a bunch of strangers.
This took guts, be proud of that.

Welcome to the forum.

EDIT: Missed a word in a sentence, somewhere in there.

 

[Gs172003]

I have a heck of a time peeing when I'm tense but...I also pee...alot. And I mean alot.
I also recommend kegels if you aren't doing them already.

 

[Deleted member 541]

I would also make sure that you don't have an infection, either kidney or bladder.

 

[Kolten]

I'm sorry ur going thru this. I cannot personally relate but my wife has had the same issue or issues when it comes to this. My wife had trauma occur in her childhood that resulted in this becoming of issue as an adult. She was always very paranoid about making it to a bathroom ontime before anything would happen. Any public place we ever went or anyones home we went to she was in the bathroom immediately. It was like her safing off herself from harm almost. The good news is thru therapy and lots of routines and positive self talk I have watched her beat all of that and become a more confident woman in herself alone. She seems to have let go of the bathroom paranoia and others as well. She functions today almost at a 180 from where she had been at times.

Keep working hard at it and at urself and u will be putting this behind u soon. I wish u the best of luck! Stay positive!

 

[Penny C]

Thank you so much for your kind responses. I am overwhelmed that there is a community of people who are sympathetic about this type of thing.

I have been to the doctor and she confirmed that it all looks normal down there.. it is definitely a trauma symptom. I usually wear Depends but I hate them and I am hoping that I can find a solution to the problem and not just find a way to prevent public embarrassment. I will try the breathing but it is hard to remember to calm down and breathe when I think I'm about to have an accident. Especially in public. Something to keep working on I guess.

If other people have insights I would still be happy to get them. Thank you again to everyone who responded to this.

 

[Deleted member 541]

@Penny C Even though your dr has "looked down there" and there doesn't seem to be a problem... looking doesn't see issues within the bladder, urethra or even kidneys. I would think that a work up with a Urologist might be helpful. JMO!!!!