Struggling To Believe My Father Did This

[EmmaOwl]

I was not sexually abused but I can relate to this dynamic of a parent having different behaviours for...

abusive parents often put there children in to roles...i do not know what there rationale is for doing that though...Does anyone else know.

I don't believe my parents were abusive. My older brother and my father had some conflicts which I observed at a very young age, and I think contributed (One of my most vivid memories involves a massive argument between my father and my older brother - I think I'd gotten him in trouble for something. I didn't know any better :(

We were treated differently but we were very different people - as were my parents. They had a child at 24 - before they were ready, and a second child at 33 - when they had no reason to expect one. Naturally our lives were different. My brother has been quite unkind to me, regarding .. oh, all kinds of things, saying that my parents weren't strict enough, that my parents paid more for my college than his. The missing info with this is: They would have been happy to help, had he gotten into a similar spot.

He complains that I never got in trouble and he always did... but he truly took things too far, whereas I toed the line pretty well. Here, I'm talking about high school. I skipped a lot of small homework assignments, yeah, but I didn't get a D in English because I didn't hand in a term paper. Yeah, I was really incredibly sarcastic and sat in the back corner and all...but I did enough work to get B's which was sort of what my father and I settled on without too much conflicts.

You see. Those specifics, this is how I see them. My brother would surely write this differently. Although his adolescence including the abuse of a little girl, which I've left out.

Yeah I'm kinda bitter. But it's not just abusive parents that treat different children in different ways.

 

[Freedomfighter]

Hi, everyone. I have only recently started recovering memories of sexual abuse as a child. I stru...

I don't think there is a pattern with many pedophiles. The most vile act of abusing a child can most certainly only affect one child. You have to be very careful about what siblings and family friends say because that is secondary.

I was abused as a kid by my father and he let total strangers abuse me as well. Everyone swears he is the greatest guy ever, I have cut all ties with him.

I learned that people who pretended to help me after a stalking case in actuality were lying about everything. They even went so far as to lie that other people raped them, that other people stalked them and all of it was only a ruse in order to get close to me. I still find that shocking, but since I had just gotten PTSD during those times there was no way that I could have deciphered that. If I would not have had PTSD during those times I would surely have identified those horrific pedophiles much earlier.

Anyways, it is very typical that others will rally around a predator and even attack you on the premise that such person could not have possibly done anything wrong, since this person did not treat them badly.

Such is the behavior of a calculated pedophile. Every time a pedophile nears a victim, he or she will also make sure to display actions that give him or her an alibi. The one thing that I have learned so far is the fact that someone that is truthful will show themselves to you without any pretense, will clearly let you know exactly what they are all about, will never attempt to make you guess at their intentions.

The older I get the more I understand how vile my father really is.

 

[EmmaOwl]

The older I get the more I understand how vile my father really is.

I'm so sorry, Freedomfighter.

 

[MissInvisible]

I don't think there is a pattern with many pedophiles. The most vile act of abusing a child can...

Thank you for your post and I am so sorry for what you've been through. Peace and safe hugs:hug: