Told Therapist About Self Medicating And Self Harm

[Deleted member 37474]

Last week I noticed myself inflicting pain on my arm when I was really angry. I also fought an inner battle of wanting to smoke pot to numb it all. Gave in once.

So today I told my therapist and she made a note of it in her book and said, "so you are wanting to self medicate." And then the conversation completely moved on. What does this mean?

 

[Laika]

She probably misinterpreted you, and thought that you were considering smoking marijuana as a form of medication

 

[anonymous]

Or she doesn't see it as particularly serious. I've told my T about occasionally doing all kinds of things (klonopin, valium, pot, etc). She doesn't really talk to me about it. When I told her I was taking ambien every night, she sighed and asked me how much. I told her, and she said, "Okay." End of story.

 

[Deleted member 37474]

She probably misinterpreted you, and thought that you were considering smoking marijuana as a form of med...

I don't know. I don't think it is a legal option here. I told her that I don't like that I know that I am using it to numb away the pain. I actually think it is okay recreationally, but not okay if you are using it to cover up stuff that you are supposed to be dealing with. I told her that. Honestly, if I could still drink wine (now allergic) I would do that to relax and forget.

 

[UnicornSightings]

What did you want her to say? I think that's good to note. What did you want her reaction to be? Did you want her to be worried for you?

I told my T awhile ago I really wanted to cut and she didn't say much. I realized I really wanted her to ask more about it while I would avoid the topic. I would want her to keep trying to get me to open up, put a lot of effort into it, so I would know she really cares. I wanted her to worry about me the way my mom got me to worry about her. Fascinating!

What you wanted as a reaction may be different but really good stuff to know. Bring it up next time. Psychology is fascinating. Oh and btw, good therapists won't make big deals of things. You're in the driver's seat and if it's important to YOU, that's what's most important. So they won't worry because worry implies we aren't strong enough to get through it. The whole point of therapy is to empower us.

Love to you!

 

[Iamsensative]

What did you want her to say? I think that's good to note. What did you want her reaction to...

Yes, wow this is a great question. This is what i neefed and got from my therapist. I didnt realize that his reaction would mean so much to me. I burned myself badly and i didnt tell anyone at first. My psych, who never reacts asked to see my arm and wanted me to call my therapist. I wouldn't and he asked if he could tell him. My therapist reaction, mixed anger, caring concern touched me. I finally saw i was reacting to the abuse, replaying and no one helped. Bur ir took his reaction for me to nternalize.

 

[kilted]

"Self-medicate" is a therapists word for using substances (or activities) to alleviate sub-conscious or conscious feelings of distress. This means it's a symptom of a problem rather than the problem itself, which is why many therapists don't react the way others do when this sort of stuff is mentioned..... they know that it's normal for people who have trauma and ongoing distress to do this and expect it.... it's the method that varies.

In a similar way to prescribed meds.... self-medication doesn't solve the underlying issue, it makes it easier to live with, and comes with side-effects.