Sexual arousal after flash backs

[Irod]

So what does this mean when you have a flashback of a gang rape and you get sexually aroused?

 

[Edic]

It means your body is remembering the sensation and you were forced to endure. as if you are expecting it to happen again.

 

[Irod]

But why the arousal to an event that was not in any way pleasurable in fact brutal, demeaning and completely helpless situation.

 

[Epol]

But why the arousal to an event that was not in any way pleasurable in fact brutal, demeaning and completely helpless sit...

That's exactly it, maybe your body wants to recreate it so you can manage it differently to undo the damage that terrible disgusting event had on you? ive struggled with this myself.

 

[Irod]

These feelings have been coming to me like this for a long time. they are trouble some.

 

[Epol]

These feelings have been coming to me like this for a long time. they are trouble some.

they've nearly driven me to suicide. That's just a response its like bracing for a big bump in the road. Your traumatized so you expect to react to those events again. The event has etched a response in your brain, a response for a terrible event.

 

[Epol]

Try to realize how you feel, and take check of what you are thinking of.

 

[Irod]

I think you maybe right it is trying to reconstruct the event but then it seems like I'm wanting this to happen again. I don't think so. At least I hope not.

 

[Epol]

I think you maybe right it is trying to reconstruct the event but then it seems like I'm wanting this to happen again. I...

You dont want it to happen, thats why your having this response.
Ive suffered through this so many times, ive acted on it sexually. Ive tried looking at porn to reconstruct the event, ive tried acting on images that i tell myself im aroused to while having the response to abuse on my mind. This is a form of suffering a very twisted form of suffering of a victim who has been traumatized. You don't want this to happen because IT IS NOT YOU FAULT.

 

[Irod]

I have acted out on it a couple of times now. I got myself into some bad places and got hurt some more. They were bad choices that has been most my life bad and poor decisions . This event happened near the end of a bad period of time in my life. It was a long time ago. Still fresh in my mind like it was yesterday. I know that none at the abuse and violence was not my fault. I just wish it could give me a break. It seems whirred to me that I get aroused by thoughts of violence and I have been unable to have sex for years or for that matter let some one even touch me.

 

[Epol]

I have acted out on it a couple of times now. I got myself into some bad places and got hurt some more. They were bad cho...

There is no quick fix, that is the hardest part. But know that the shame is not yours to hold onto, it is the monsters that did this to you.

 

[Epol]

Can you talk to someone you know about it? There is no shame in what happened to you, can you find anyone around you who can support you even if your not happy with yourself?