High functioning with ptsd/cptsd

[intothelight]

Been reading some interesting blog posts, articles and stories by and about people who have PTSD/CPTSD and are high functioning. By high functioning they have stable and meaningful relationships and friendships, successful careers, enjoy outside activities, classes, hobbies and social gatherings, are reasonably healthy and have found a way to manage symptoms long term and with minimal impact to their day-to-day existence.

Variables that vary individual to individual are the use of medication or not using medication, regular therapy, therapy as needed or no therapy. However there are a few things I have noticed they all have in common such as goal setting, no self-pity, and do not engage the thoughts of "I can't".

Love to hear from people who would define themselves as "high functioning" in one or more areas and the obstacles they have overcome and how they overcame them. Tips for symptoms management and strategies for achieving their personal goals.

The purpose of this thread is to encourage and assist with growth.

 

[Rani G2]

By high functioning they have stable and meaningful relationships and friendships, successful careers, enjoy outside activities, classes, hobbies and social gatherings, are reasonably healthy and have found a way to manage symptoms long term and with minimal impact to their day-to-day existence.

I am NOT high functioning , because I Do not fulfill much of the criteria BUT there are a few aspects where I feel I am in a more stable mode.

meaningful relationship: I am in a stable relationship with my partner since 10 years.

Friendships: No.

Career: Not meaningful! but I work fulltime since 5 years.

Hobbies: Gym. Fitness ( Not the most motivated but it works)

Social gatherings: Selfdefense course

Havent taken psychotropic drugs only herbal.
I was diagnosed with CPTSD due to sexual abuse, violent childhood, living with parents having mental issues.

I visit my alternative practitioner regularly: I take 2 kinds of herbal meds, vitamin D, vitamin B12, I avoid artificial foods, I dont have any chronic illness and I hardly get sick except maybe a few allergies.

Its not high functioning but I cope ok

 

[scout86]

I was thinking of myself as "high functioning" until I read your list. LOL (I hadn't considered all that 'playing well with others' stuff. Was mostly thinking about 'survival' stuff. Which, now that I think on it some more,, might relate to something my T keeps trying to call my attention to.)

On a 'getting by in the world' level, though, self pity had never seemed to serve a useful purpose. The trick, it seems, is to balance avoiding the decent into self pity with avoiding the truth.

do not engage the thoughts of "I can't"

This is big for me too. I think we can usually do more than we think we can. The first limiting factor usually seems to be the limits we set on ourselves. I've been in enough difficult situations and seen where 'failure is not an option!' can get you, that I really believe in the idea. (It can be hard to keep that attitude 24/7/365 though.)

 

[intothelight]

seen where 'failure is not an option!' can get you

I can see that in some cases, but perhaps an attitude of what can I do to make it better is more realistic. Failure is a personal judgement and what may seem like failure could be a more valuable in learning than success. Just a thought.

 

[intothelight]

@PURUSHA You listed a lot of things that are big accomplishments and that are going well. The list was from observation of what was read and are just areas that might make people think and help with their own recovery. I think functioning and being reasonably happy is success. "High Functioning" will help people find the information if they want and unfortunately media doesn't publish much about doing OK when in reality that is one of the best hallmarks of recovery.

 

[scout86]

Another good example of how my brain works. LOL I was thinking of "failure" in a more concrete sense. Like "fail and you die". But, I agree, there can be lessons learned from 'failure' too.

 

[Tinyflame]

Dear @intothelight what a lovely topic!

By high functioning they have stable and meaningful relationships and friendships, successful careers, enjoy outside activities, classes, hobbies and social gatherings, are reasonably healthy and have found a way to manage symptoms long term and with minimal impact to their day-to-day existence.

Reading this I thought OMG, I certainly shouldn't reply as by society's standards (or my own) I do not have status, or power; I don't make a 6-figure salary nor have a circle of influence, nor am a spouse or mom- I'm pretty small and invisible and incidental really- and Idk if I'm healthy- but I am resilient. And I did not want to do the common norm as Brene Brown said to spend time saying what I'm not, when asked if I/ what I am.

Pretty humbly however I do say in regards to all who've those posted above and yourself included, I see your strength and perseverance and see that as accomplishing much functioning. I think it's easier sometimes to see where we feel we fall short rather than function well.

For myself I've worked full-time all my life; I've gladly and happily sacrificed my time and energy and effort to try to support and encourage those I love in need, and 'do', I have always stood by their side. I have stayed and fought as hard as able to stay within their or our crisis, and try to care and bring them hope.

I believe I have less judgment towards others' struggles and circumstances.

I try to support others. I make friends easily but I am very private and can show up at most events, but I can 'fake it' but am not a social butterfly in my heart, though others prefer to put me in that role.

I succeed connecting with others with cognitive issues and difficlties where others can't.

I enjoy peace and love when people feel happy, safe and content. I enjoy being genuine and others' success.

I am happy for healthier choices I made to not get in to or stay within violent or abusive relationships, nor not be true to myself and commit to something that didn't fully engage my heart.

I think I do well at respecting others, being aware of the impact of ptsd, wanting good things for others, listeniing, accepting what is my responsibility without shifting blame.

I have noticed they all have in common such as goal setting, no self-pity, and do not engage the thoughts of "I can't".

I agree with this. ^ . I think responsibilty and managing fear (esp fear of the past repeating) are my onus; they can appear as self-pity but I think are less attitudinal but cognitively influenced.

Love to hear from people who would define themselves as "high functioning" in one or more areas and the obstacles they have overcome and how they overcame them

I think breaking denial, chipping at fears, just 'doing'; being authentic, forgiveness, embracing others' rights to live as they choose; getting to know yourself, taking actions to be comfortable in your own skin.

I was thinking of myself as "high functioning" until I read your list. LOL (I hadn't considered all that 'playing well with others' stuff. Was mostly thinking about 'survival' stuff. Which, now that I think on it some more,, might relate to something my T keeps trying to call my attention to.)

I'm not sure @scout86 - being able to survive in crisis is a skill many lack, and very important when you see the consequences with it's absence.

The trick, it seems, is to balance avoiding the decent into self pity with avoiding the truth.

I really think so^ .

I think functioning and being reasonably happy is success.

Really strange- as a person who has to manage fear and learn coping skills, I still feel a tiny glimmer or 'point' of happiness and peacefulness within me that I think is greater than many.

I suppose the best thing I do is love much, but that's kind of not really a yardstick of high functioning or achievement, though I think it's an achievement to persevere and also not be bitter or hopefully be kind/ positive.

Oye- I hope I haven't answered this question wrongly and inappropriately-for-qualifying-or-speaking-to-it (and so long!), like an exam question gone awry, lol! :eek: :confused: With courage I'll post vs delete.

Because I work everyday with physical, mental, chronic and terminal illness, and have my own challenges, I see everyone as not having the same cookie-cutter pinacle as how to define high-functioning or success; I think we are created sort of like puzzle pieces to be high-functioning in really out-of-the-box ways and not all be the same or even define what we want the same ways. I think everyone is very successful to keep trying and to try to give or produce something positive (even if it's refusing to give in to despair/ which is an example against it) every day. (JMHO though. :notworthy: )

Great thread! :)

 

[theshadowoftheliving]

I haven't been posting much lately, and it is in part to my thoughts on this exact thread.

I think "high functioning" is a dangerous term in a way, as it refers exclusively to outside markers of "success."

I am high functioning. I keep a high powered job, I have good friends, I am involved with helping people. I keep a clean household and present as well-manicured and well tailored. I stay in shape. I eat well. To the outside world, nothing is wrong.

I accomplish this all in a really simple way: avoidance and an acceptance of personal misery. I have days that I stay awake until all hours of the night because the nightmares are so bad, and then I show up to work with concealer on to hide what I look like, and a deep breath that helps me dissociate from my body so that I can perform the way that I am expected to.

Having CPTSD or PTSD or DID (in my case) is actually contingent on the symptoms providing distress - it isn't considered a disorder unless it has "functional impairment." So, in many ways, having any of these means that we aren't truly high-functioning, and I think that is okay. (For me, my apparent high-functioning has actually made it really, really hard for me to get appropriate treatment, as my distress isn't taken seriously).

 

[EveHarrington]

I haven't been posting much lately, and it is in part to my thoughts on this exact thread....

Just wanted to say that I really appreciate your post!

 

[Tinyflame]

it isn't considered a disorder unless it has "functional impairment." So, in many ways, having any of these means that we aren't truly high-functioning, and I think that is okay. (For me, my apparent high-functioning has actually made it really, really hard for me to get appropriate treatment, as my distress isn't taken seriously).

I understand this. However, I wonder if it would be helpful to separate completing tasks from living with a degree of joy in life? That is, to recognize most or at least many people hide their struggles and white knuckle through at great cost and peril to themselves, but it is up to ourselves to be truthful to T's or clinicians , and choose clinicians that believe us? And in this case, perhaps employ someone who specifically understands DID? Because, in another way, presenting well means you've found a way to accomplish that. Yet, at what cost, and/ or how authentic/ honest are you being about the cost? But the choices and happiness or fulfillment part come from us, we may be able to choose different careers, or what have you. Rarely I think can we accomplish everything without something suffering, even without complicating factors like ptsd, and I'm not sure that therapy itself can change that. We can't have everything.

Just a thought..

 

[scout86]

I suppose the best thing I do is love much,

My T likes to say that what mattress must in life is "Loving and being loved." So, maybe, that's 'success'?

 

[Deleted member 541]

High functioning according to WHO??? Is there some standard out there that I'm not aware of that I should reach for????

@PURUSHA You work, you're in a relationship, you work out, you participate in life! Isn't that functioning????

What the hell is HIGH functioning and what would that look like????