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High functioning with ptsd/cptsd

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The suggestion of the PERMA peeps wanting to add V for Vitality took my brain straight to a book I read about mucus forming foods by Arnold Ehret that was originally written back in the 1920s or 1930s. Although, I read the revised and annotated version first.

They mention a formula of V=P-O, which means Vitality = Power - Obstruction. Once our obstructions (consumption choices/habits) outnumber the power, we're robbed of our vitality...and the obstructions are readily assigned various names, be it heart attack, stroke, high cholesterol, common cold, etc.

It took a couple years of me eating mostly mucus-free foods, and adding them back in again, then removing them again, to have that formula finally make much more sense to me. I used to pretty much stay sick with one ailment or another...especially sinus infections, chest colds, flu bugs, stomach viruses, bronchitis, supposed seasonal allergies, etc., etc. Haven't had those issues to deal with since flipping the script on all things consumed. (knock on wood)

I had become almost bed ridden and mostly non-functioning prior to those changes, so I'd have to say they are correct. Keeping that formula in mind has definitely helped me feel and become a lot higher functioning than before I made so many drastic changes. Which can be both a blessing and a curse...because others tend to judge only on the surface, not making time to know the depths of the being.

It always amazes me what gets defined as being highly functional. When I was in abusive relationships, working full-time and then some for the state, having to lie and mask wrongdoings repeatedly or else be let go, having to eat unhealthy options for the sake of "convenience" to be able to continue my work and schooling and such, not being able to sleep well, if at all most nights from worry and stress, having to put on the fake smiles to interact with folks I'd never choose to voluntarily spend energies on knowing their modes of operating, and having to pretend everything was normal is when I was viewed as being a highly functioning individual and would receive awards and "atta-boys" left and right. (until I spoke up about the unethical bullshit)

Now that I choose to no longer consume animal products or highly processed/artificial substances, make my own hygiene and cleaning supplies, have learned to more healthily manage parts of my physical and mental health that I was told would require prescription medication the rest of my life, can grow my own foods, can safely forage in the wild for plant nourishment, can make tinctures and flower essences, barter for services, no longer have a full-time formal job, have no interest in faking anything for anyone, can make crafty things that enrich the lives of others, etc., I'm viewed as a full-on weirdo and basically non-functioning, based on societal expectations. lmao You really can't make this shit up.
 
Hah, took me a bit but I found it... bear in mind however for those who register... that the results are skewed because a large number of respondents are university students: User login | Authentic Happiness If you click Questionnaires on the pull down menu you will see a wide variety of testing and you can elect to participate and get your results... I did it a couple to a few years ago. PERMA (Dr. Seligman's model) and also GRIT are included in there with some stuff about emotions. Highly recommend it and I personally found it immensely helpful.

What is GRIT and do you have it? The thing about participation in these types of things is it helps me to be more mindful about goal setting and strategies to be more "high functioning" irrespective of triggers, disassociation, PTSD cycling and straight up melt downs. I got a lot of progress with those tools.
Grit and Self-Control | Authentic Happiness

GRIT (Angela Duckworth) 51 minute video interview here: Angela Duckworth: "Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance" | Talks at Google
 
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make my own hygiene and cleaning supplies, have learned to more healthily manage parts of my physical and mental health that I was told would require prescription medication the rest of my life, can grow my own foods, can safely forage in the wild for plant nourishment, can make tinctures and flower essences, barter for services, no longer have a full-time formal job, have no interest in faking anything for anyone, can make crafty things that enrich the lives of others, etc., I'm viewed as a full-on weirdo and basically non-functioning, based on societal expectations.

Your "weirdo" comment made me smile as I have a few friends that live completely off grid and are completely self sustaining. I can't think of any higher functioning than that because with my black thumb I would certainly be destined to starve. It sounds like your passion is nature and holistic living; and a goal of enriching the lives of others is very honorable and personally one I find more desirable than making a lot of money.
 
I've been high functioning, low functioning, & non-functioning over the past 20 years.

A few different times. Damn cyclic disorder :wtf: Although the upside is now that I know it's cyclic? I can plan for it.

It took me about 2 years to parse out all the things I did differently when I was high functioning, as well as how I managed the transition from low to high. It's a huge list of individual ticket items & complex systems, that all feed into each other and act like a system of safety nets & checks/balances, so no matter how suddenly I plunge down, one -or more often several- catch me and pop me back up. I don't have it all written down in one place, or I'd cut/paste the sucker. To keep things relatively simple I'm just going to use High/Low, but Non is also in there. Just mentally attach it to the seriously f*cked up side of Low.

A few themes off the top of my head:

- I've been highly symptomatic AND both high functioning & low functioning. The major difference between them is/was how my life was set up. Yeah, a lot of that was purely based on luck... Isn't fair... Etc. And I don't give a good god damn. What can be put in place by providence, can also be deliberately designed.

((A couple examples include when I was Active Duty and when I was a stay-at-home-parent. In the first the military literally took care of everything I struggle with & can't manage on my own when my head is f*cked (housing, food, clothing, correct & incorrect standards to live by, money, social interaction, healthcare, exercise, etc., etc., etc.)... And in the second I built those things into my life my own self. Small pieces over time, but they all added up to create a structure where everything I struggle with? Was taken care of for me. Either by others, or by seriously badass prep-work. So I rarely "had" to do anything at all. I didn't have to watch my kid, cook, clean, pay bills, et cetera. Those were things I chose to do, as I felt like doing them. I didn't feel like doing them? Pfft. No worries. I have contingencies already built into place.))

- Being symptomatic -in both places, High & Low- is virtually identical. I'm not able to do XYZ. When I'm high functional? I still can't. What I DID do, however, was do every step A-W in advance, so that XYZ just "happened" without my needing to do it. I just placed a call, or called in a favor, or paid the fee, or whatever. All I had to do to make XYZ happen was pull the trigger. I'd already taken the firearms class, gotten my license, bought the weapon, trained with it, and it was on hot standby, in reach. At all times. High functional? I shoot the bear. Because I've already done all the things necessary to have a trigger to pull. Low functional? Bear is going to maul my ass. And, yeah, that's part of why each system is self perpetuating.

- High functioning (for me) depends on connection to others. No matter how brief, any connection helps, but longer is better. Think of a flying trapeze for a moment. The vast majority of the time the flyer is alone in the air, but it's connecting with both the bar & the catcher that allows the motion to continue. Without those points of connection, and the momentum gathered between them by individual hard work, the flyer is on the ground. The first time I was really poorly & kept taking myself off to be alone, it was other people fetching me back out to go work a job with them that kept me functional, period. Erratically functional, both very high & very low, often changing on a dime, but without them and the external structure they provided? Without the focus point? It would take me 10x as long to even begin to unf*ck my life. They couldn't make me go, that was always my decision to get up off my ass and drag my self off with them (and I didn't, always, sometimes I told them to f*ck off and continued sulking for a few more months), but without them doing so? Without external direction and purpose handed to me on a silver platter I was unable to create my own. My head was too far in the past to even manage the present, much less plan for the future.

***

There's more but ^^^ 3 are all super-linked together & and the others aren't, necessarily. So my brain is done for now ;)
 
I seriously hate conversations about functioning. Seriously.

Those who are high functioning look down on those who are low functioning. (Fact about society.)

And then you have high functioning people who have it all (house, partner, family, friends) who say they suffer just as much as the homeless person who has nobody. I kind of call BS.

People think it's the PTSD which drives my suicide attempts. Nope! It's being alone and having nothing which drives them. So please don't tell me we all suffer the same. We don't. If I was higher functioning, I wouldn't have tried to kill myself earlier this year.

Blah.

Not expecting or wanting anyone to give a damn. Just voicing my opinion.
 
Those who are high functioning look down on those who are low functioning. (Fact about society.)

This is exactly why I feel it is dangerous. Even if those that you feel is looking down on actually aren't (as that's a distortion) I feel that we can compare, much like trauma comparing, and feel we aren't functional enough and end up with lower self worth rather then striving (or trying to or whatever the word is you want to use as that is just semantics) to function better which I do feel is healthy and good.

Maybe I am still thinking about this wrong and I honestly am not trying to derail the thread but rather trying to work this out in my head (I think).

Maybe if we feel that we are lower then those that function better or find ourselves comparing rather then trying to grow, we can work on that?

I don't know. I compare myself to everyone every single way you can compare yourself to someone and so maybe that's why I can't work this out in my head.
 
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