Can you rate your sexual abuse on a scale of 1 to 5 question at therapy?

[Purplebutterflyy]

hi, just looking for some advice. I’ve just started seeing a councellor. In our session she asked me if I could rate my sexual abuse on a scale of 1 to 5? The question really got to me, rateing it?! Is that normal? It made me feel judged. Like I don’t derserve to feel the way I do? What if she doesn’t think it’s that bad? Am I over acting?

 

[EveHarrington]

I’m trying to wrap my head around a way that this could be therapeutic but I’m coming up with nothing.

I think this is a horrible approach to take with clients who are seeking help to work through their sexual trauma.

Most of us tend to minimize what happened. The struggle is in admitting just how devastating it was.

IMHO all sexual abuse deserves a 5. I’m not saying that all SA is equal. I know it’s not. I know some are abused more than others.

 

[Justmehere]

Frankly, that would totally weird me out.

Are they a trauma therapist or more of a generalist - ie are they trained in one or more trauma specific technique?

Maybe she was getting at trying to gauge how much the trauma bothers you? I’ve been asked that before (although not asked to give it a rating) and that was more about symptoms than the severity of the event.

 

[Suzetig]

That's nonsense, I'd rate my SA at 0, I know my T would rate it as 5+ on a scale of 1-5. How can you rate the severity of what happened to you.

 

[barefoot]

Ooh, yuck!

Agree with @Justmehere that maybe your therapist was trying to assess the impact on you/how much it is bothering you.

But it’s not a useful question in any way, in my opinion. I would have no idea how to answer that. And I wouldn’t actually want to answer that.

 

[Mach123]

Not a good start sorry for you hope things improve. I'd tell her (I know you are new to her so you probably feel confused) that that question was wildly inappropriate and listen to her explanation. Then go from there. Even the best therapists need some breaking in, in my experience. : )

 

[Recovery4Me]

If you have already answered the therapist with an rating, then I prefer not to address the methodology or modality of your T.

However, I will offer that perhaps you might consider asking that Trauma Expert to present that said scale - found in psychology or neuroscience (?) which offers such basis of quantified trauma.

 

[nowthisisme]

Umm that question confused me.. maybe she was trying to get you to realise that your undermining the SA ... very confusing approach.

But from my experience, honesty and being straight forward will make this process so much easier for you. Ask your T exactly what she meant with that question, what was she trying to get to. It take some time to get used to someone new so be as honest as possible.

Good Luck

 

[Sideways]

I was asked, many many times, to tell my therapist how bad I thought my trauma was. Because I was in denial and had been telling him that I benefited from it, and it became part of the ongoing dialogue about how I was traveling with my denial.

As a way for the therapist to actually try and assess how bad the trauma was? It’s a pretty disgusting question.

As a way to gauge how you feel about it? I think it’s potentially a good question. Because if you rate it as 1? There’s probably an issue.

 

[Gs172003]

hi, just looking for some advice. I’ve just started seeing a councellor. In our session she asked me if I c...

Why the hell is this even a question??

hi, just looking for some advice. I’ve just started seeing a councellor. In our session she asked me if I c...

Find a new therapist..

Not a good start sorry for you hope things improve. I'd tell her (I know you are new to her so you pro...

Any therapist just starting to see a client that asks this question isn't a good one. Run.

 

[anonymous]

I was asked if mines was sporadic and I was hurt by that, as if had it been sporadic it wouldn't have had as bad an effect? Well that's not true because even one of the times was extremely terrifying, I was only five years old and it hurt so bad I passed out. I think to rate it is a bad thing, it is all bad, isn't it. Doesn't matter what was done, it was still unwanted and scary for you and needs the right help dealing with it.

 

[Gs172003]

I was asked if mines was sporadic and I was hurt by that, as if had it been sporadic it wouldn't have...

I wonder how much of this is therapy and how much is freaking nosiness