Supporter Just Sharing - Wife With PTSD Violently Attacks Family

[Nevergivup]

Thank you for the advice. I have taken all steps necessary to ensure the safety of the children

 

[Kubash16]

Thank you for the advice. I have taken all steps necessary to ensure the safety of the children

I really hope so. Can I ask how you’ve ensured it? There may be things you haven’t thought of yet that those on the forum can help with.

 

[Justmehere]

We have sought professional help. Medication is helping but is not a cure. The best medicine for my wife is plenty of sleep and lots of love from us. I can handle this but fear for the children i.e. there mental well-being.

You and the kids are at risk for developing PTSD down the road from what is happening now. Right now, the trauma isn’t over, so their healing can’t even begin. You and the children are survivors of serious assaults and threatened/attempted murder. Peri-traumatic support, that is support close in time to the trauma, is essential to reducing this risk.

It’s so good professionals are involved. Are they aware of the violence to you and the children? If so, what do they recommend? If not, what’s holding you back the most from telling them?

 

[anthony]

Fair, that can be your opinion. It does have strict criteria around symptoms and life experiences to lead to the diagnosis though, so I'm curious what crit A shit equals over diagnosed.

PTSD is over-diagnosed. Not even a questionable fact.

Just please, please, please protect your children.

So after all the shit you gave the guy the first time, now you want to be sensitive? Make up your mind.

If a f*cken woman came here living in abuse, I doubt very much you would be tearing her down. So why the f*ck are any of you doing this when its a man?

Talk about equality gone stupid nowadays. Wake the f*ck up to yourselves people and get rid of your bias and bullshit before answering. f*cking inconsiderate arseholes is what many of you are being.

 

[EveHarrington]

I have taken all steps necessary to ensure the safety of the children

You left your wife and took the kids with you?

 

[Nevergivup]

Would the person who added a sentence to the title I gave this topic please remove it. The title I wrote was "Just Sharing" That is all. My position is not click bait. I am seeking others who can relate to and discuss with me this particular manifestation i.e. out-of-character spontaneous violent aggression - especially against those that are loved the most.

I suggest the following link:

This is how severe PTSD can look. Anyone suggesting that acute PTSD cannot be associated with collapse into unconsciousness knows very little about it.

 

[Friday]

Would the person who added a sentence to the title I gave this topic please remove it. The title I wrote was "Just Sharing"

Staff edit titles where necessary. For exactly the reason you stated. (Bolded below)

I am seeking others who can relate to and discuss with me this particular manifestation i.e. out-of-character spontaneous violent aggression - especially against those that are loved the most.

To get in touch with Staff please use Contact Us

 

[Neverthesame]

@anthony I don't know if you were including me in the many inconsiderate arseholes group? If not, then disregard this.
I don't care what genitalia the OP has, I'd have said the same thing. Man abused by woman, woman abused by man, man abused by man, woman abused by woman or man abused by three eunuch midgets dressed as a clydesdale horse. I don't care.
As a parent, he has the responsibility to protect his kids. He comes on here, tells a story of his poor traumatised wife and the unfortunate things she's doing to their kids. While he stands by watching, giving her lots of love and bed rest.

So far, he's seemed far more concerned about his own ego, making sure we all understand that he knows what PTSD is and how best to treat his wife, than the welfare of his kids.

He says "steps have been taken for the kids" ok.. What steps?
He regales us with a tale of his wife garroting a toddler with an electrical cord (which is the only reason I said anything here at all), though he's far more concerned that we understand his level of understanding in regards to PTSD.
I'm not even remotely interested in discussing anything with this guy about his wife until I know what's being done to protect those kids.

Abused or not, male or female, he is still a parent whose responsibility is to the safety of his children. Or am I somehow wrong here?

 

[Chris-duck]

I second everything @Neverthesame said

 

[Kubash16]

Considering my mother’s role in my abuse I would react the same. How can I not stress that he get out after what he described? Frankly I’m a bigger bitch to women then I am men, considering the resources available. Me caring about kids and not him makes me an inconsiderate asshole? Okay, that works, but I would react the same, if not worse, if it were a woman.

 

[Ronin]

out-of-character spontaneous violent aggression

What makes you so sure it is out of character?

If someone does something like that repeatedly, it may very well BE their character...

If they do something heinious like your wife has, it may, also, be well their character, for were it out of it, that act would not even cross their mind, much less be something to act on, and their own would be the first they try to keep *away* from it, not dragged in, or even target.

Ditto why I don’t think it is a disorder problem. Been an asshole, for quite a time. Lived with assholes. Where you direct violence and what forms you give it is so much more choices, than illnesses.

You are not responsible for, or to, your wife, but to your kids.
Or, if you cannot either, then to let someone who *will* be responsible to them, take care of them.

Edited> & Her upbringing is *precisely* the reasons to take your kids & get out, and while working on reconciliation, yourself, if you feel like it THEN, not tolerate outbursts of violence.

Because this is NOT war. Because now is not then. Because family is not enemies. Because family is not enemies of then. If that is truly who she feels in those episodes, if they are it, she needs to get the difference through her head.

By not making her acknowledge her conduct is unacceptable, you are not helping her.
Helping her is not taking that stuff, now.
Saying out of both experience *and* concern.

 

[EveHarrington]

out-of-character spontaneous violent aggression - especially against those that are loved the most.

If she is violent toward herself and/or others, and is experiencing episodes such as what you describe, that means she is not safe and hospitalization should be a serious consideration.

My therapist and doctor ask me if I am safe and won’t hurtmys or others, and if the answer is no, it’s hospitalization time.

I’m also concerned that you think love can save her. It can’t.