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Who am I

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Whoami

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Is there really any hope? Are people really able to change their core beliefs, to move on from self destructive behaviours.
If our subconscious controls 90 percent of our behaviour then what hope have we got using our consciousness brain with only 10 percent control. My rational/conscious mind has learned everything there is to know about personal growth but it's useless because my subconscious believes things that I don't even know about. If we are almost completely controlled by our subconscious then we are nothing more than a product of the people and circumstances in out life. We have no control. Not in the things that matter. So why do I keep fighting this battle. Why am I here and who am i
 
I think you’re making a number of assumptions.

I also think your brain is in highly defensive mode. I think you’ll have to find a way to relax your brain so that new information can get in, because as long as you’re holding on so tight to these negative beliefs, nothing new has a possibility of even seeping in to your mind in the least.
 
The things I’ve wanted to change, I’ve been able to.

Not just by wanting them to change, but the things I don’t want to change? Or am invested in? Doesn’t matter how much I “should” want them to change, or how much effort I put into a result I don’t really want, there’s simply no traction, there.

Generally I start out with what annoys me or pisses me off the most, and work my way down the list.
 
I think you’re making a number of assumptions.

I also think your brain is in highly defensive mode. I think you’ll have to find a way to relax your brain so that new information can get in, because as long as you’re holding on so tight to these negative beliefs, nothing new has a possibility of even seeping in to your mind in the least.

You're right, I think my brain probably is but how do I change that? I have practised meditation (of many kinds) near enough daily for 3 years and yoga regularly for 1 year and whilst it makes me feel better to have a hobby and to be relaxed and present, it doesn't change my future emotions. I can be positive for a month or so and then suddenly it feels like I haven't actually been positive, I've just been covering everything up and the pain is overwhelming. I don't want to be living the past over and over again but when I can't cope I get angry and suddenly I'm reliving it again.
 
Yes change is possible. Some things I may not want to change on a deep level. Then there is also things like ocd an autism and schizophrenia. All of those I listed can still be subdued and worked with with lots of work. The ptsd stuff, those core beliefs can change I know that for a fact. Some of them are so outrageously ingrained that I'm not even aware of what they are.

So there are many, many ways to get in touch with your subsconscious mind. If you want to know the ones that helped me I will let you know. I didn't know if your post was just a question of: is it possible? I agree a lot with @EveHarrington I just came into the whole awareness of how my brain goes into these protective stances. I have to choose to have an open mind, to have "possibility" thinking. Positive Psychology is a thing. You might want to start there. The armed forces uses it in boot camp. Just google "positive psychology" and a lot of resources and information is available. That is just one start to opening the mind to positive change.
 
Are people really able to change their core beliefs

Absolutely! But it takes a long time. Some longer then others. I grew up in a cult. Those core beliefs were engrained so, so, SO, very deep. Many are still there. Most are still there. But some aren't. Some have changed. So, they are changeable. Took me 10 yrs of therapy but they've changed. You just have to be willing to work on them. Work on understanding that they aren't true. Even if you don't believe that at the time. And then work on unraveling each and everyone of them, looking at each one, understanding why each one is there, working on all the micro issues around each one, and reframing them into new beliefs. Its a hell of a lot of work but absolutely doable.
 
Are people really able to change their core beliefs, to move on from self destructive behaviours.

Yes. To both.

If our subconscious controls

IDK which outdated research are you using for these figures, but nah.

Mostly because subconsciousness is not a mystical all mighty entity.
How we work with our brains & how they work with us is an interactive process, not so linear, not so one way.

Would be nice if it were, tackling trauma would be heckuva easier.
 
PTSD wants everything inside of you, all the time. Sad mad guilty shameful regrets anxiety, you name it. It wants to own every moment of every day and night. PTSD tells you there is no end to your suffering. This is true. But your identity is not your sickness. This is a hard reality. You have to be both miserable (PTSD) and self-aware (identity) at the same time. The more I give the more distance I gain from the dark hole. Think about how small you are in a mighty universe, and do what you can to improve the world. You can build at least a partial identity based on good works. We have very little in our lives that has not been tainted by mental illness. When you give, authentically, it's something we can take to the "bank" which is incredibly rare for us. That's all I got.
 
Yes change is possible. Some things I may not want to change on a deep level. Then there is also things like ocd an autism and schizophrenia. All of those I listed can still be subdued and worked with with lots of work. The ptsd stuff, those core beliefs can change I know that for a fact. Some of them are so outrageously ingrained that I'm not even aware of what they are.

So there are many, many ways to get in touch with your subsconscious mind. If you want to know the ones that helped me I will let you know. I didn't know if your post was just a question of: is it possible? I agree a lot with @EveHarrington I just came into the whole awareness of how my brain goes into these protective stances. I have to choose to have an open mind, to have "possibility" thinking. Positive Psychology is a thing. You might want to start there. The armed forces uses it in boot camp. Just google "positive psychology" and a lot of resources and information is available. That is just one start to opening the mind to positive change.

Yes this is correct. I'm so extremely hyper vigilant which is the same as tilting at windmills or fighting some battle from the past.

But I do know this now.

If I just remember I can do it but I forget.

Like last night I didn't like the waitress. It was a whole thing you know? But I didn't notice and the thing starts running in my sub conscious and I have to hear my wife say in the morning "you didn't like the waitress" because she saw it I "showed."

But I can do it if I remember so it is possible. My sub conscious still tries to take over but I can consciously stop it if I become (what mindful? iDK). : )
 
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