I slept with my therapist, now what?

[Mee]

Can you retell what has happened to you with different ‘characters’. Imagine instead of you and your therapist - two fictional people. Change the genders maybe.

Can you relate it to any of the high profile stories there have been about abuse of position / power?

Does this help you see how this makes your therapist a highly unsafe person to be in your life and doing that job?

Has your partner been made aware? Was your sexual contact unprotected? If so have you had STD tests?

 

[Rumors]

Both of us are female.

So your first sexual experience with a female was with your therapist, hmmmm... Honestly, I think this is pretty dangerous. Having a first sexual experience like that can be hard enough. Having it with your therapist makes it impossible to filter through it carefully with discerning eye. I would see someone else personally. I probably wouldn't have gone to her home when she invited me though. That would have felt pretty inappropriate. Will you tell your husband?

 

[user27357]

I always took the advice that" if your therapist isn't making you work so hard that it isn't fun, hire a new one" to some degree. remember that they work for you, sounds like this one enjoys the work so much that the personal time is confused with the professional time.

 

[LuckiLee]

I think you need to report this person, asap. The medical board will tell you what you should do after that.

She has sent your healing backwards and has now caused more damage to your psyche and marriage.

Report her!

 

[Deanna]

Will you tell your husband?

That's a good quesstion. She doesn't have too, obviously. I still can't believe the therapist would risk her degree but if she has a drinking problem, she might have forgot about her degree, never-the-less her livelihood.

 

[Muted]

He knows and he does blame me also, because I’ve had feeling for her for most of the time we’ve been counseling.

 

[Justmehere]

Transference, especially erotic transference, can be very powerful and hard to manage. It’s very different than romantic feelings for someone. It might feel the same but it’s not.

You are responsible for the choice to continue seeing her. You may feel helpless but you are not actually helpless. You can take steps to get outside support to work this through.

Dead Link Removed

 

[Mee]

He knows and he does blame me also, because I’ve had feeling for her for most of the time we’ve been counseling.

May I pose a rhetorical question?

Your use of the word ‘blame’ feels slightly in juxtaposition with your posts so far; do you feel there is ‘blame’ and do you place it anywhere? Do you feel responsible for this ? Do you feel your T is? That you both are?




Addressing this with yourself might help you get an understanding of where you are and what to do going forward.

 

[Muted]

May I pose a rhetorical question?

Your use of the word ‘blame’ feels slightly in juxtaposition with your posts so far; do you feel there is ‘blame’ and do you place it anywhere? Do you feel responsible for this ? Do you feel your T is? .

I feel like we were both responsible.

 

[Muted]

Dead Link Removed

Thank you for the article.

 

[MrMoonlight]

I hope you don't take all the blame. Probably easy to say but in a doctor dare say therapist patient relationship the therapist is 100% responsible all of the time.

Sorry this happened to you.

 

[blackemerald1]

I feel like we were both responsible.

^Good. Because you cheated. Doesn't matter who with or why. You have to take responsibility for your part. Face up to it.

It wasn't an accident & you've basically said in your first post that you've had feelings for her since you met her. Idk but in my world I know exactly who I sleep with and why. Even if the the reasons for it are all wrong. I still know.

She's your therapist. Or was. Now she's a mighty big problem for you and your marriage too.

And btw if somebody told me they slept with me accidentally - because they blacked out - I'd kick their ass to the curb. Sleeping with me would be unforgettable lol... There's no such accidental thing.

But seriously, lousy excuses aside. Get her out of your life and report her before she accidentally sleeps with somebody who really falls for her and does something like, I don't know, suicide for unrequited love or something.