Only adjustment I can think to make is to do my processing with someone else, so when I do come to her with my feelings, they're exactly what I mean and more concise. I have a tendency to go on wide, looping tangents before I discover the real point I'm trying to make. Sigh. ?
That’s probably a good idea... the most linear, straight-forward conversations tend to be the most productive. High emotion and squirrelly “talk through feelings” conversations tend to go straight to the dumper. Same with “come to Jesus” talks about deep relationship issues when they’re symptomatic ?.
I also find it helpful to let out a little frustration or emotion when I’m alone... especially on those designated asshole days. I like to break old plates against the back of my shed “to make mosaics”. If I happen to take a shot, cuss, and smoke a cigarette while doing it, so be it.
Self care is important too... your emotions are valid too.