The core beliefs I would like to discuss are #1 the belief that we are responsible for our trauma, that is was our fault. #2. The fundamental belief that there is something wrong with us.
A long time ago, I sought professional help from a trauma treatment facility. They explained that our imagination is strong enough to affect our emotional reactions. If you think of something scary, you feel scared. If you think of a peaceful lake with mountains and a forest all around it, it is relaxing. I was instructed to find a place in my imagination that I felt safe. No matter where it was, mine was in a cave when I started, now I am on a sunny beach feeling safe. This concept was so foreign to me, I had to learn, practice, and learn and practice, but I knew for me it was the right thing to do. My T's helped me form an image of safety, not by drawing the image, but guiding me to safety through their understanding, or description of it.
Anxiety prevents resolution. Relaxation doesn't enable the feelings of safety. Imagining we are in a safe place will help us relax. When we lower anxiety we increase our ability to be aware of the present. Then we increase the understanding of what we feel like when we are safe now. Ever since I was informed of imagining a safe place, This is what I have been doing.
I was once told a long, long time ago, that I had mal-adapted behavior. Now I see, I adapted perfectly to the mal-training I received to handle the mal-treatment I got, both were at home. I was not trained professionally at all until I started T at 21 years of age. When I started, I had no understanding of what happened or even who I was. I had no understanding of what I needed to do to handle it. Talking to T's I learned. I think a lot of times T's misunderstand that the solution is in us, not in their understanding, but ours. The conflict is in us, the solution is in us. The reasoning was missing in me. When I learned to verbalize what I understood, piece by piece the T could help me understand my circumstances better which enabled me to resolve each conflict.
I am not conflict free because I don't run into conflicts. I am conflict free because I know now what resolves conflict, the goal is for me to be safe, and keep others safe, what I needed to do to know I am safe was my resolution to the ultimate conflict in me, and it is also the same resolution to all my conflicts. Once I understood what I needed to understand that feeling safe was the goal, then I could understand what I needed to do to get there. I recovered by explaining how I understood what I needed to do to be safe and what I understood safe meant to me by talking to T's. My memory was not important. My conclusion that "I" drew, as a result of the memory was my conflict. When I understood I was mistaken about my conclusion, it resolved. While I was correct to respond in fear, the danger ended but my awareness that it ended was not accessible. I had to learn how to do this: but what I did was connect the awareness that I was safe now, to my conflict. The conclusion changed, when the awareness hit me. Peace was the result.
While the conclusion that I was still in danger now was inaccurate, the conclusion that I was in danger then could not have been more accurate. I was right to fear, the threat is gone, the danger is over for me. It is safe to relax. And relax I did, I am functioning better. And I am at peace.
I am here.
A long time ago, I sought professional help from a trauma treatment facility. They explained that our imagination is strong enough to affect our emotional reactions. If you think of something scary, you feel scared. If you think of a peaceful lake with mountains and a forest all around it, it is relaxing. I was instructed to find a place in my imagination that I felt safe. No matter where it was, mine was in a cave when I started, now I am on a sunny beach feeling safe. This concept was so foreign to me, I had to learn, practice, and learn and practice, but I knew for me it was the right thing to do. My T's helped me form an image of safety, not by drawing the image, but guiding me to safety through their understanding, or description of it.
Anxiety prevents resolution. Relaxation doesn't enable the feelings of safety. Imagining we are in a safe place will help us relax. When we lower anxiety we increase our ability to be aware of the present. Then we increase the understanding of what we feel like when we are safe now. Ever since I was informed of imagining a safe place, This is what I have been doing.
I was once told a long, long time ago, that I had mal-adapted behavior. Now I see, I adapted perfectly to the mal-training I received to handle the mal-treatment I got, both were at home. I was not trained professionally at all until I started T at 21 years of age. When I started, I had no understanding of what happened or even who I was. I had no understanding of what I needed to do to handle it. Talking to T's I learned. I think a lot of times T's misunderstand that the solution is in us, not in their understanding, but ours. The conflict is in us, the solution is in us. The reasoning was missing in me. When I learned to verbalize what I understood, piece by piece the T could help me understand my circumstances better which enabled me to resolve each conflict.
I am not conflict free because I don't run into conflicts. I am conflict free because I know now what resolves conflict, the goal is for me to be safe, and keep others safe, what I needed to do to know I am safe was my resolution to the ultimate conflict in me, and it is also the same resolution to all my conflicts. Once I understood what I needed to understand that feeling safe was the goal, then I could understand what I needed to do to get there. I recovered by explaining how I understood what I needed to do to be safe and what I understood safe meant to me by talking to T's. My memory was not important. My conclusion that "I" drew, as a result of the memory was my conflict. When I understood I was mistaken about my conclusion, it resolved. While I was correct to respond in fear, the danger ended but my awareness that it ended was not accessible. I had to learn how to do this: but what I did was connect the awareness that I was safe now, to my conflict. The conclusion changed, when the awareness hit me. Peace was the result.
While the conclusion that I was still in danger now was inaccurate, the conclusion that I was in danger then could not have been more accurate. I was right to fear, the threat is gone, the danger is over for me. It is safe to relax. And relax I did, I am functioning better. And I am at peace.
I am here.
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