Does this count as trauma?

[Workingonit]

With women i fawn or flee. With prolonged abuse I dissociate mentally. I think that is the right term. Escapism, irritability. Never been a woman beater. I'm definitely hard to deal with and even when my kids mom used to hit me I never got violent or angry. I guess I never really felt threatened because after all what was she really going to do to me.

 

[Workingonit]

rambling away

Ramble away brother. Say what you need to say. Just be respectful.

 

[Workingonit]

It's why I use terms like armed group or VNSA because we definitely went beyond just drive-bys and they had "treaties" in place with our local cops that they would get a cut and walk out of the evidence room with bags of coke that even the newspapers made fun of but no one did shit to stop.

Ieds were every where in iraq. And car bombs. After I fell out they sent me back to the motor pool. I was a mechanic afterall. Some things happened and I got assigned as security at the pow camp guarding insurgent amputees for about a month. An ied killed a bunch of people at my old area and I got assigned as the clean up crew. One of them had his top half removed/disfigured the others were reduced to people giblets. When my old co found out he put a stop to it that day and I got assigned to another area that wasn't as hot.

 

[Workingonit]

Even a civilian can get it every once in a while

There was a little boy that used to come in for medical treatment for burns over most of his body. The official story was an accidental grease fire. But the interpreters told us what really happened. The boys father owed the local warlord money. So the lit him up with gasoline for not paying. Pretty sure we got that f*cker.

 

[Workingonit]

"treaties" in place with our local cops

This pisses me off far more than my own trauma. I only have three words to describe it. Woodchippers, feet first.

 

[Workingonit]

@Weemie
You know, if they did their jobs. Your life could have been so different. I hate it.

 

[Workingonit]

@Weemie
And now youre broken and most of them probably have pensions. Make it make sense.

 

[Workingonit]

@Weemie

Sorry man im probably not helping you at all.

 

[Weemie]

@Weemie

Sorry man im probably not helping you at all.

Nah bro this is your space! I had a reply but then I just went off about my shit so I moved it to my own diary. But you are correct, the folks who caused me harm who are not dead or in jail are very much living the good life to this day.

I can only take solace that I didn't become a trafficker or gang member as they were training me to be. I got out fully at age 16 and I have never looked back. f*ck all them guys.

And I am sorry for you that the people who employed you and caused you to have these experiences seem to be tossing you by the wayside. They sent you out there and they should help put you back together at home. It's a shame how veterans are treated in North America.

 

[Workingonit]

Nah bro this is your space! I had a reply but then I just went off about my shit so I moved it to my own diary. But you are correct, the folks who caused me harm who are not dead or in jail are very much living the good life to this day.

I can only take solace that I didn't become a trafficker or gang member as they were training me to be. I got out fully at age 16 and I have never looked back. f*ck all them guys.

And I am sorry for you that the people who employed you and caused you to have these experiences seem to be tossing you by the wayside. They sent you out there and they should help put you back together at home. It's a shame how veterans are treated in North America.

They are helping me. At least I think they are. It just takes time. I didn't ask for help until recently because I shut down and got into some legal troubles over money and contempt charges.

I pretend to be tougher than I am and thats on me. That and avoidance.

 

[Friday]

What does it mean? Was it classified? So many questions. Very little answers and nobody will tell me anything. I hate this feeling.

I spent a couple years harassing Missouri for my records… hired an attorney and had them in less than 24hrs.

They weren’t actually correct which had me in stitches and my attorney infuriated (the errors were, bizarrely, in my benefit… I didn’t serve that long. But the times & places I was at were periodically doubled -2 places at once!- or tripled; ditto promotions waiting for time in grade, etc., so someone did the math and came up with almost double my time in. Um. No. Dates? Are a thing. Shrug. Whatever. That my records are a clusterf*ck? Is just kind of damn typical. For about half of the time I was in, I was under 4 damn commands. At the same time. Which was eyecrossing to live, and caused a helluva lotta problems for me… so some clerk somewhere just said “f*ck it” and added them all together? Yep. That’s about right.).

 

[Workingonit]

I spent a couple years harassing Missouri for my records… hired an attorney and had them in less than 24hrs.

They weren’t actually correct which had me in stitches and my attorney infuriated (the errors were, bizarrely, in my benefit… I didn’t serve that long. But the times & places I was at were periodically doubled -2 places at once!- or tripled; ditto promotions waiting for time in grade, etc., so someone did the math and came up with almost double my time in. Um. No. Dates? Are a thing. Shrug. Whatever. That my records are a clusterf*ck? Is just kind of damn typical. For about half of the time I was in, I was under 4 damn commands. At the same time. Which was eyecrossing to live, and caused a helluva lotta problems for me… so some clerk somewhere just said “f*ck it” and added them all together? Yep. That’s about right.).

Thanks Friday. I hope it doesnt come to that but theyve been pretty good so far. Just a bit slow. I have my dd 214s Its just the detachment stuff i want and they said in the email they escalated it to the army because they dont have the authority to make a determination. Whatever that means so ill wait a little longer. Either way i have alot of evidence for my va claim so whther or not my detachment got a puc is irrelevant really. I have my arcom with a v device that should be enough.