I am so very, very thankful that I found this forum, and that I found all of you on this thread. Here I am understood, and I can understand what we’re all going through. Sometimes it’s so very hard to believe for good to come out of the ashes. But what other choice do we have? Any other choice leads to destruction. I have lived a long life with struggles at every turn, BUT GOD!!!!!





When I look back at my life, I can see the hand of God and how He was present during every trial and tribulation. I can see that I was never alone, even though I thought I was completely alone. I can see His faithfulness to bring beauty out of ashes, and allow us to see the roses in the midst of the thorns.
At this point in my life, God has changed me, because I have intentionally chosen to trust him and to believe him for his Word, and to make better choices in my life, ones that please my Father and my Lord. Nearly my entire life I lived my life from a position of fear. My life started that way and it just kept going that way. I didn’t know any better and I didn’t have guidance to direct me any differently. But I have clung to the Lord and his Word, and He has been faithful to be there for me, to carry me through each trial, to get to the other side of it, to see the beauty that he creates out of the ashes, even in the seasons, when I did not even know him! Only God can do that!
I am so very, very thankful to finally be with my people, here with all of you who have walked a difficult path, (and in my new online church, after being pushed out of three churches because my life was too messy.)
People let us down. People hurt us. BUT GOD NEVER DOES! Our Heavenly Father is faithful to walk us through every single step of our journey. We have the gift of his love, and the presence of the Holy Spirit to lead us and direct us in such a gentle and kind way. We have the ability to choose to do things His way and not our own. We have the privilege to watch Him work miracles in our lives and to see the blessings that come from choosing to do things and pray things according to His will. Each time we do this it is like saying thank you to God, keeping the love of God going and passing it on to the people in our lives. All of this blesses our Father.
I have finally learned to stop trying to fix everything, and to rest in the Lord by trusting and believing that God loves us, and He is there for us working all things together (the good, the bad, and even the ugly) for our good and His glory. My very favorite verses in the entire Bible are these:
““Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.””
Matthew 11:28-30 NIV
I know there are times when each of us are weary and carry heavy burdens. But I also know that when we come to know God and to seek him through prayer, Bible study, and community with other believers, we come to understand verses like these and the Holy Spirit gives us the power to make changes. We come to a place of peace, even in the midst of chaos. It doesn’t happen overnight, or at least it hasn’t for me. It has taken me 60 years. But I pray that as I share my testimony and what I have learned, that it will make it easier for someone else to “get it” sooner. I pray for each of you when you post here, and it is a great comfort to me to know that you are all out there praying for me as well.
Thank you all for sharing here, whether it’s a verse or sharing your heart and your story, or encouragement and worship, or asking for prayer. It is such a blessing to be in a community of believers who demonstrate love to one another. It is a privilege to agree in prayer with all of you for miracles, and to see them when they happen. I am so grateful to be here with all of you. Have a beautiful and blessed day with and in our Lord Jesus.






