Preverbal Trauma - Infancy

[Linda Lee Bogard - King]

Hi Allitherapy, I asked about having children because it sounded like you did not have the experience. I made this remark to my friend before responding. Finding peace is a bit like a scavenger hunt, we never quite searching. Joy to all and raise a glass for another day to appreciate in spite of ourselves...

 

[allitherapy]

Nope, no children. 3 abortions as a young teen after being raped multiple times and 1 stillborn at 7 months pregnant more recently. Never told anyone about that, must be time for bed. Hopefully kids someday if I make it that far..

 

[BloomInWinter]

Hopefully kids someday if I make it that far..

I have NO doubt YOU will be a wonderful Mommy!

 

[Abbi]

There are studies run in other cultures, adulthood, where the learning and knowledge is not what English is, so to experience rape and what we determine to be abuse, because we assimilate words with a meaning, then emotion, other cultures do not have words for, and the same events are not even traumatic, because their culture cannot describe it or understand it as such, so it is not so.

Ok this one completely lost me? So what are these studies trying to conclude. Would be interested to take a read through them if you still have some reference to them.

Maybe I am reading this wrong but did the study try to say the "emotion" is from the meanings culturally attached to the word rape not the act of rape itself. So if we called rape I don't know, "fun family activity" and there were culturally no bad meanings attached with it, we would have no trauma attached to it?

Really confusing.

 

[TLight]

I must say it would be very helpful if some grammatical teacher could proofread some of what is being written. That sentence above is very long, contains a lot of concepts, confusingly written and very hard to interpret accurately.

 

[intothelight]

Maybe I am reading this wrong but did the study try to say the "emotion" is from the meanings culturally attached to the word rape not the act of rape itself. So if we called rape I don't know, "fun family activity" and there were culturally no bad meanings attached with it, we would have no trauma attached to it?

I think the concept falls under a theory of the "social construction of reality". It basically states that how we interpret our reality is dependent upon the "norms" taught, directly and indirectly, by our family of origin, community, religion, culture, etc. Our definition of "normal" is defined through the framework of "social norms".

In some cultures, a passage to adulthood are marked by rituals that people in the western hemisphere would interpret as violent and possibly traumatic. But for members of that society, they are just "normal".

Just my .02.

 

[Awakening]

My mother had a traumatic birth with me, she has eclampsia, a seizure, kidney failure and was given a 50% chance of living/dying. For 3 days she was in a coma. My father had to start thinking about what he would do hire a nanny etc.
My father was told by a social worker that he needed to see me, but at the time he couldn't face it. My parents were only 23 & 24 at the time. They feel guilty that for 3 days no family member held me.

And me, can't remember a frigging thing! Although I'm reminded every birthday. It was their traumatic experience, not mine. I feel sympathy for my parents, being so young and now that I'm a parent myself but I don't believe it's had any impact on me.

I know that's just a personal experience and not scientifically researched but my belief it is no matter how traumatic your birth was, it is way more traumatic to be the one GIVING BIRTH - ugghhh!

 

[Abbi]

I know that's just a personal experience and not scientifically researched but my belief it is no matter how traumatic your birth was, it is way more traumatic to be the one GIVING BIRTH - ugghhh!

Can we hear an AMEN SISTER! :tup:

 

[i think its very sad]

I know this is irrelevant & I should learn to keep my mouth shut but I've read about asian mothers who read academic textbooks to their fetus in the womb & they believe this is working. Apparently, they have already taught their baby to understand language & have moved on to educating. I didnt bother to research this & I thought it was quite far-fetched & agree in advance with the experts who say it is impossible. I guess at the time that I read it, I believed it.
Does anyone have an opinion on whether the baby benefits at all from this?

 

[allitherapy]

It's always good to expose the baby to language, music, etc. The baby learns to recognize voices and the language that will be spoken, but no, you're not going to "educate" your child in the womb. It's hard enough to educate them when they're in school!

 

[TLight]

ps. I am trained as a scientist also and there are many studies supporting that traumatic memories are usually not thought to be able to be implanted by therapists that that train of thought has been extremely revictimizing of survivors.

Why on Earth would someone have all these symptoms and distress and someone can say that simply because they don't remember, nothing happened? OH............news to me. Guess I'll just get over it.

Anthony, in my honest opinion you should keep your theorizing and paper writing to a peer reviewed journal and not be the 'be all end all' knowledgeable one on PTSD in this venue. Really dangerous if you ask me.
ps. go ahead and ban me.

Just need to add a note here of apology over the confusion. Anthony's post that says 'Basically if you can't remember it, then you are not traumatized by it and you may actually be falsifying memories' was very general. The issue of infancy and when the brain is able to remember things should have been referenced up front. Also, the distinction should have been made between that and repressed memories. Then I would not have had such a reaction to this.

Many people do not remember their trauma, it in no way means they are falsifying.

 

[Abbi]

The issue of infancy and when the brain is able to remember things should have been referenced up front.

Look at the title of the thread, and the post he was replying to it was obvious as there was only one post before it and it asked the question.

The questions being asked and the debate that followed was about memories from birth of the infant (some even claimed to be pre-natal memories).

What would be "dangerous" or at least patently cruel would be leaving mother's who had difficulties during birth/delivery with the impression that the babies/children had some memory of this, were psychologically harmed by it, or that the "seed of PTSD" had been planted. Read the whole thread, in my opinion it got pretty "out there".