What Made You Angry Today?

[Froggie]

Found out that my youngest sister snaked her way on Facebook to make friends with 2 of my children. She is a very manipulative and narcissic personality who will revert to violence if she doesn't get her way. I've already found our mother blacked and blued face and body because she didn't have what my sister wanted. She's been in court a few times and almost lost the care of her children, she's on and off with her husband and she has no budgeting idea. None of the brothers and other sister want to deal with her as she is BAD NEWS on 2 feet. This really peeved me off as they have no idea just how bad a situation they can find themselves in. She's a former junkie and still has drinking problems, she only helps herself when a Judge doesn't give her a choice, but then ... it's who cares, I'm the boss and I'm OK sort of thinking... Absence of responsability.

Oh man, I didn't sleep well last night because of this. My kids don't deserve this. I refused her as a friend on FB ... just reading what she wrote was enough to tell me ... She Hasn't Changed ! It was a Me, Myself and I monologue of the Poor Little Me Blah Blah Blah ... What did my kids get themselves into :cry:

 

[CraftyCath]

((((Froggie)))) I'm feeling for you Froggie. This cannot be easy for you and the family. I'm thinking of you sweetie and will listen anytime.

I was angry because my husbands family haven't been to visit or even phone my husbands Cousin. His dad dies 2 years ago after he had looked after him, with no help, for over 10 years. Then his Mum died a year later on exactly the same day that his Dad died. My husband is the only family member to visit him and a few of them live only a couple of streets away. We live across town. He went to see a bereavement counselor who was controlling didn't believe his story and told him he was not to go back and see his doctor! He has since refused to see this counselor but was able to share a lot with me last night. Sometimes people are so thoughtless, the lad is on his own and the rest of the family ignore him.

 

[Spidersilk]

Screaming spell at a family member placing my binoculars into a backpack without the binocular case, "Why don't you ever take care of my things! what's makes you think you can just throw my stuff in your backpack and not even have the case ...." on and on. Then my 11 year-old asking what he was suppose to do before bed. "If I have to answer that question AGAIN, you will have to write 25 times tomorrow! How many years have I had to answer the same question? Over and over again..." and on and on. I can handle these situations so much better when I am not having a "flare up." (I discovered how that works with me today). I hate being out of control and losing it over stupid things. I want to manage myself better during these flare ups and learn more about them because, if I don't, I feel the way I do now--exhausted, ashamed, embarrassed and like giving up. :cry:

 

[amethist]

Damn selfish Mother -In -Law.

 

[CraftyCath]

Damn selfish Mother -In -Law.

Family can be so thoughtless

((((Spidersilk))))

 

[Froggie]

Candle lite for all of you

 

[CraftyCath]

I spent all yesterday stuck in the house with my 2 grown up son's but was looking forward to going to our dance class with my husband when he came home from work. He had taken the car as the weather was appalling. When he came home I asked about the dance class and he said he had something to do. That 'something' turned out to be bl***y football!!!!!! I was so angry! I felt neglected and disappointed. I wanted to cry. :cry: I went to my room to do some relaxation and read a book and just couldn't speak to him again until later. I'm so p***ed off! :mad:

 

[nyxsea]

I am angry today because I am going to face my counselor who wanted me to try a new med for my depression. Well, let's say the experience I had was a surreal-er version of my life in hell. While on this new med I found out my Aunt has terminal cancer, had a melt down in Old Navy because they had taken the clothes I HAD worn into the store & mixed it in with their own clothes. Freaked out so bad that my friend made me call the PN. The PN told me to try the drug for 2 more days. I canceled all plans that i had made for the week-end because I could not function. Looking back I can't even remember conversations that I had during that time frame.

Went for a VERY (in my state I could have caused an accident) foolish 3 hour drive and convinced myself that the guy I had a date with was going to be my future boyfriend..I had planned our life out on the drive (some sort of manic thinking going on there). Got home all excited...only within time found out that he has just disappeared. GONE

Did not sleep more than 2-3 hours for 7 nights. Got up last Monday morning after just lying in bed for hours and paged the PN for help. This was 7:15 in the morning. She was so abrupt and uncaring about my situation. Laid into me for how she does not like to be PAGED. Panicked and scared for most the morning. Felt like shit for even bothering her. Once again I was reduced to nothing by a caregiver. She did apologize but the feeling inside of being abandoned by the PN who put me on these meds has not eased over time.

The day after this, my 21 year old son was sideswiped as he was making a turn. I am the only parent on duty. So, I had to gather whatever wits I could gather to go help him through this process. The accident was 2 miles from our house and I got lost 3 times trying to get there. The insurance proceedings were hell. Hours spent on the phone. Thursday my dad calls to see where we are at...I am weepy. He told me to stop crying, I hung up and went & got high.

Still feeling God knows what..I haven't felt the same since going on this med. And I AM ANGRY...for the lost time, for people not listening to ME when I say I don't DO WELL going on new meds. That it takes me at least a month to recover. Another 3 weeks of my life wasted away by this. And so this is just another layer in what was already a horrific summer of un-pleasantness. Needless, to say I AM PISSED OFF at most of the world.

I AM ANGRY AT MY DAD FOR NOT LISTENING TO WHY I CRY.
I AM ANGRY AT THE MEDICAL COMMUNITY WHO DON'T LISTEN.
I AM ANGRY AT ME FOR TRYING TO APPEASE SAID MEDICAL COMMUNITY.
I AM ANGRY AT THE THINGS I HAD TO CANCEL..WHICH WOULD HAVE DONE ME MORE GOOD THAN THE STUPID MEDS.
I AM ANGRY THAT I SHARED THIS HORRIBLE TIME WITH FRIENDS AND AM WORRIED THAT MY MED INDUCED INSANITY HAS SCARED THEM AWAY.
I AM ANGRY THAT ONCE AGAIN I HAVE LOST TIME TRYING TO FIX SOMETHING THAT I DIDN'T CAUSE.

Thanks for listening...felt good to get that out. Appointment is today at 3. I don't want to go. But, will force myself anyway...cuz that is what good troopers do. UGGHHHH

 

[Froggie]

((((nyxsea)))) listened ... candle is lite for you too.

 

[nyxsea]

((((nyxsea)))) listened ... candle is lite for you too.

Thanks so much Froggie...I appreciate the hug and candle.

 

[CraftyCath]

((((nyxsea)))) Thank you for sharing, my thoughts are with you. x

 

[amethist]

Solicitor.

Not answering his phone and no voice mail available, which there usually is.

Doberman is pulling at her leash now.