Does Anyone Else Feel Like An Outsider In Chit Chat?

[Deleted member 1860]

Cuz I do. You know that kid who nobody wants to play with? That's me. Everyone comes in here for fun but I don't as I'm not good at making friends.

Of course, this question is geared toward those who won't see it, as those who will are comfortable in chit-chat...ie those who arent in chit chat cuz theyre uncomfortable wont see this.

It's really pathetic that I can't even be social online cuz I know I'll be rejected. Oh well.

 

[Tanishq]

Oh ScaredofLonely,

I want to tell you something. Nothing wrong in going into chit chat and have fun for a while. Um, I did feel strange going there because I came here, All I want to do was let out my stuff from my chest, get some help for a while. Our some problems are not quick fixes. I think you are being hard on yourself.

No need of it.

You know, I am curious to see what you have got to share with us. Do share slowly, I know it will be enough to have fun time with you.

:hug:

 

[piratelady]

You mean the "Chit Chat" Forum or the Chat?

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Chit Chat = the name of this forum. But really, it applies to both. I'm bad at chit chat. I'm bad at small talk. I guess that's why I suck as a friend.

Really, i have nothing to add, sorry =(

 

[piratelady]

I think this is the last place that anyone would reject you. Perhaps this is the place to try to put yourself out there and see what happens. What do you have to lose?

In all honesty, I don't always feel like I fit in here. There are things I write out to post and then never hit the button for fear that I will be rejected or won't fit in. This is probably the most accepting forum. This seems to be the ideal place to try being yourself, post some stuff...type a word in the word association thread and see what happens. Worst case scenario, you don't get a reply. Best case scenario, you make a friend.

 

[Tanishq]

Chit Chat = the name of this forum. But really, it applies to both. I'm bad at chit chat. I'm bad at small talk. I guess that's why I suck as a friend.

Really, i have nothing to add, sorry =(

If you were so bad then I don't think you would have spotted this blockage.

You have courage deep down in your heart. Perhaps you can't feel it, but I can see it. Just give it a shot, in chit chat forum. Just make a post there whether you get instant result or not. but I am sure you will feel good something. Just google about nice posters, things you love or things you would like to love. Post it and share it here. No one is going to reject you or make you feel bad. I give you guarantee on this. :)

It's only a matter of time you start sharing as you wish.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I'm sorry, it was a mistake to say anything.

 

[Shellbell]

Dear ScaredOfLonely.

It takes courage to start a thread and you did that. I am sure you have a lot more to offer than you know.

I put a thread of here saying I felt like such a bad mother. I got lots of support, even though it was something that I could have been shot down about. But parenting with PTSD is hard.

I'm sure that what you have to say won't be rejected. People will chat with you. People will support you. I know I will :)

 

[Sandstone]

I feel the same way, ScaredOfLonely.

You're right - I wouldn't have seen a thread in Chit-Chat had I not looked at "What's New". I'm only replying because I want you to know you're not alone.

I read here almost every day, but rarely post because I expect not to be heard, understood, liked. I'm not sure whether it's better when I get a reply or when I don't.

I value immensely what I learn from others here, but I wouldn't dare join in most things, partly because I don't think I have anything useful to add, but mainly because I don't expect to be accepted or included.

I think that's why it feels easier to join in a "serious" thread. They have a function and a comprehensible structure, ethos and style. The light-hearted bits are more of a mystery to me, and carry more of risk of treading on someone's toes or not following the conventions of the "in-crowd". I constantly expect that uncomfortable silence that makes you realise that you've tried to join the banter but dropped a huge clanger instead.

So perhaps I'm even more vulnerable that you SOL, as I not only don't expect to make friends, but expect to make enemies, without even trying.

I don't think you're pathetic and I don't think you should be sorry. You're openness has helped me take a bit f risk, so thank you

 

[ms spock]

Chit Chat = the name of this forum. But really, it applies to both. I'm bad at chit chat. I'm bad at small talk. I guess that's why I suck as a friend.

Small talk is just practice. You will get it ScaredOfLonely.

 

[ms spock]

I feel the same way, ScaredOfLonely.


I value immensely what I learn from others here, but I wouldn't dare join in most things, partly because I don't think I have anything useful to add, but mainly because I don't expect to be accepted or included.

So perhaps I'm even more vulnerable that you SOL, as I not only don't expect to make friends, but expect to make enemies, without even trying.

If you have an expectation you won't be accepted and included, that possibly will become a self fulfilling situation.

It is difficult to find your way and your place. I do understand that. I have challenges around this stuff too.

I think you are both great for posting!

 

[DharmaGirl]

I like you, SOL. I wish you'd come in here too.